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Monday, September 29, 2014

Ruined Orgasms

Here is a link to a very informative post recently on a blog I enjoy reading called "Becoming a Mistress":

http://mistressivey.blogspot.com/2014/09/ruining-orgasms.html?zx=200ce760f00f8925

It is written by Georgia Ivey Green, better now perhaps to some as Mistress Ivey.  It's an excellent blog to check out, especially for woman who want practicable information related to being in Female Led Relationship/Marriage.

Any, the topic was about ruined orgasms of course, which is something that seems to be constantly on my mind ... especially when it comes to being the default method that I would prefer to have an orgasm, of course if i were given the chance.  There are times when Mistress K simply wants me to have a full-on, shake the ground orgasm, and i don't have the choice. 

The reason i now prefer to have a ruined orgasm is obvious to those that use them (or experience them) in the FLR's.  There is little, if any, waning of desire that usually accompanies a full on orgasm.  Most men, hell every man, loses his sexual desire immediately following an orgasms.  I won't go in to explaining why here because there are plenty of other resources from more intelligent people than me that can explain it.  After a ruined orgasm however, my desire is still usually right there and as we all know, a submissive husband that is horny is way more attentive than a submissive husband that has recently had an orgasm.  I truly love being in that constant state of desire.  I truly have come to crave, as my primary sexual release, the non-pleasurable feeling of having my semen drain from my cock.  Frankly, for me, it's very much like being milked anally.  The semen just comes out of your body without the usual pulsing that accompanies a "real" orgasm.

My "real" orgasms are more and more rare as time marches on in our FLM.  On the surface that might sound like I'm complaining about that very thing.  I absolutely am not.  My devotion to My Wife, to my Mistress naturally and lovingly also increases during that same time. 

*** picture removed to comply with Blogger's new rules ***

Then, when Mistress has decided that I've had enough, I get up, I clean up and we go on about our day.  Sometimes there is a lull in desire afterward but not usually.  If there is, it is very short lived and it is measured in hours.  I don't know how I survived all these years without the knowledge of ruined orgasms.  Frankly, this is something that should be taught in school! *smile    OK, maybe not yet.

23 comments:

  1. I've had a few ruined orgasms but not nearly as many as you and yes it does not get rid of that horny feeling. Has she ever given you multiple ruined orgasms in one session? Also has she spanked you or used a strap on after a ruined orgasm?
    Does the spanking sting more like after a full blown orgasm.
    archedone

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    1. HI archedone .... Yes, Mistress has given me multiple ruined orgasms before and it was quite something. I had never experienced something like that before and as a matter of fact, it was that event that got my attention as to the value of a ruined orgasms.

      No, Mistress K. has never punished following a ruined orgasm, so I don't know if it is anything at all like getting punished after a "real" orgasm. Since the added dislike of a punishment following an orgasm has mostly to do with the post-orgasm hangover we men feel, I'd have to say that it isn't the same.

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  2. I haven't had a ruined orgasm in a while, but I know what you mean. Frustrating, but I like how my submission doesn't drop at all and it seems like it "cleans the pipes" out some. It is a real turn on for her to sit up and watch my sexual responses so that she knows when to let go. It's like she's using my body against me. It is pretty hot to have to clean up when you didn't have that pleasurable sensation - it makes me feel like a servant (which of course I love).

    For anon above, I have not had multiple ruined O's but she's talked about it. I do not lose my erection, nor do I feel the post orgasmic sensitivity, so it seems doable to have back to back ruined orgasms.

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    1. Thanks so much for the wonderful comment lovetosubmit. I agree on all accounts, especially the "using my body against me" comment. It's true. It would be mean if there wasn't a direct benefit for the Mistress for denying her sub a full orgasm. The satisfaction that my Mistress gets from continuing to have my full sexual attention, makes it all worthwhile.

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  3. Last year, when my wife allowed me 3 orgasms, 2 of them were ruined. I really did enjoy them , it relieved a lot of the pressure in my cock and balls after weeks of T and D. But I was still horny after both times and she liked that. She could see that I did not loose my submissiveness, and was hard again in no time. Next year when she allows me to cum (maybe) hopefully I will get a few ruined ones.

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    1. Hi AH. You've summed up nicely why ruined orgasms are so beneficial to the women we admire. Always nice to hear from you and thank you as always for commenting. I hope she let's have some ruined orgasms as well. It's none of my business of course, but there is really no reason for her not to, unless she is a bit of a sadist. if so, well .... there you go.

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  4. So funny, in a curious way, that you shared this post. A wonderful post BTW. Just the morning before I had shared this same post with my Mistress. Because that very morning she had given me new lacy panties to wear then proceeded to give me a ruined orgasm in them. Actually the first orgasm of any kind I had in a while. I love the image you selected. Mine was more of a dribble then a squirt; nothing like spending the day in damp panties.

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    1. Hi Penny. Maybe we are kindred spirits in some way? Is that what you mean by "a curious way"?

      Mine are more dribbles than squirts too, but it seems that most of the pictures of ruined orgasms depict squirting. I will admit though, there is something about that otherwise plain looking woman who seems to be in a lot of ruined orgasm pictures, that makes her a natural Domme.

      Thanks as always for stopping by and commenting Penny.

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    2. I was thinking how we were both thinking in a similar way about Mistress Ivy's post--funny, but not ha ha funny. You shared it here, I shared it with my Mistress. I hope you are having an enjoyable weekend!

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    3. Penny, it seems like great (submissive) minds think alike! I did have an enjoyable weekend, thank you. I hope you did as well.

      Thank you as always for stopping by and commenting.

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  5. You are all very lucky boys to have mistresses willing to take the time to bring you to completion even if the actual orgasm just leaves you squirting into the air.

    Something which your ladies might want to try is prostate milking. Here is a post my darling elliot wrote on the experience milking

    The best part of this for me is that I can shove the milking vibrator up elliot's bottom and get on with my day.

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    1. Thank you so much for commenting Hannah Jay. I don't know about these other fellas but I do believe I am one very lucky. When Mistress does allow me to be brought to completion as a ruined orgasm, it more like runs out rather than squirting into the air .... but I understand you comment.

      Although it has been a while, Mistress has milked me on a few occasions. Admittedly we are both still very new at it but the last we tried she was able to get some amazing results. You know what they say .............. practice makes perfect.

      The post from the link you provided is quite interesting in that your sub can be milked without having to waste to much of the Mistress' valuable time. Quite interesting indeed.

      Thank you again for commenting.

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  6. Wow, this sounds mind-boggling! I've held off before, but I think it's probably different for men--or for every individual, for that matter. The ultimate satisfaction of having no satisfaction at all...

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    1. It's quite an amazing thing indeed Autumn. I can't imagine that someone that has never experienced sub space while in a loving D/s relationship, would ever be able to understand just how powerful such a thing is.

      Thank you so much stopping by and commenting.

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  7. This is such an amazing subject and I'm so happy that all have covered it in detail my wife and I have been on this FLR for 6months married for 35years
    And have really struggled when I cum fully but that having been said this would seem the way to go will try and report back lol cheers Rancher

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    1. RDu, Mistress K. and I have been married for 15 and are closing in on or second full year in our FLM. One of the things that is different now from when we started is the number of orgasm I am allowed (full or ruined). They have diminished significantly. It doesn't mean that I want them less, it's just that is where our adventure has taken us. Better yet, Mistress K. has decided that this is the direction we are going. In the beginning, I would get orgasms almost once a week. To Mistress K. and I, teasing and denying and constant edging seemed to naturally necessitate more frequent orgasms. Then, Mistress K. just seemed to naturally deny me for longer and although I still very much would love to orgasm, I always get a tremendous amount of satisfaction by merely seeing to it that Mistress K. is the one that enjoy the orgasms.

      I think it is important to remember that the longer a sub man is denied an orgasm, the more he should be edged and tested and teased. There is a HUGE difference between tease/denial and ignore/denial.

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    2. You continue to be an insperation your blog is so helpfull on this journey you cannot believe how your honesty and complete openness is such a comfort that other couples embrace this lifestyle.im totaly committed as the days go by and my princess and I love every day we live it.its interesting how you feel after being away I'm the same as I need to travel every2-3 weeks for 1-3 days hate the time away look forward to my phone message when my plane touches down these ladies that we call our mistress are such special ladies as it does require a lot more effort in some areas to run a FLR any way love your blog you are a special couple were in Phoenix last year lovely town nice climate similar to where w live in Australia cheers Rancher

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    3. Thank you so much Rancher Down under. Always nice to hear nice things about where one lives. Thank you even more for the kind words. It's high praise to be called an inspiration.

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  8. Hey you! :) I always love your posts, but this one I really appreciate. Having a look at the feelings and whys etc behind ruined orgasms helps me understand this topic a lot better. :)

    xx

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    1. Hi Amber Brat. I find this to be an amazing topic. It's really hard to describe why for me, there seems to be a growing preference fro ruined orgasms when compared to full-on orgasms. Then there is the side of the coin. One weekend, after waking up on Saturday morning, I was informed that by bedtime Sunday night that I was going to have had 5 complete full orgasms, or face significant punishment. She required that each of them was witnessed in order to confirm. This was something Mistress did when we were early in our FLM. I'm sure you can understand the concept of a man's orgasm recovery period. It was difficult, but I was actually able to have full on orgasms in what amounted to a 36 hour period. Mistress K. was kind and helpful and helped the process along with her hand, fingers, paddle and the use of a butt plug. On that weekend she seemed to know exactly when to "step on the gas" when she could sense that the desire tank was running dry.

      At the end of the day though, really, whether I go 50 days without having and orgasm or and required to have 5 in 36 hours, it's all about what my glorious Mistress wants, even if it is on a whim. I often asked what its like to have an actual sex slave. Perhaps a better question would be what is it like to have a whim slave?

      Thanks as always for stopping by. It's always extra special to pop in and see there are comments from you.

      XOXOXOX

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  9. You really should explain to your Mistress that being required to always consume your ejaculations is part and parcel to a submissive man's training throughout the duration of his relationship in a fem led relationship. I realize that's it's not for everyone and in the beginning on my FLR with my husband, it was not something I'd even consider. However, after having spent some time with my best friend who also lives as a dominant to her husband, and has more experience in than I do (she has been dominant in their marriage for 15 years), she explained to me that it has been the most powerful recurring rule of their that always serves to symbolize to her husband the nature of their relationship. Of course it's not something he wants to do, but he does it gladly because she expects him to.

    Love your blog.

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    1. Gulp (no pun intended).

      Thank you for commenting Anonymous. I appreciate your comments of course but I'm pretty certain that it isn't my place to "explain" anything to Mistress K., at least as if was designed to define for her what our live together should be like. She has stated in the past that she has very little interest in having me consume my cum even once, let alone every time it happens. I don't know what her reasoning is and I don't ask.

      I always appreciate it when anyone takes the time to comment here. I know that it means that on some level, the reader has an interest in what is being said. It's a rare enough treat to be able to hear from a Dominant wife in a FLM, let alone one that has a bestie that also does. Thank you for taking the time to contribute.

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    2. Most submissive (and some Dommes) find it repulsive at first. But that passes quickly and then most couples adopt it as a basic commandment of their relationship. A submissive man that is required to do eat his cum will have to really want to cum knowing he will be required to consume it. Particularly during the initial period when it will seem so wrong. My husband didn't want to in the beginning either but now he knows no other way and now loves to demonstrate his submission to me this way.

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