Sunday, January 10, 2016

Are we there already?

Are we at that inevitable point in our relationship, where Mistress's pleasure naturally would/should include another man's cock?  Maybe one that isn't prone to erupt in seconds because it has been constantly teased and denied, for weeks on end, like mine can be?  Is it that time in our relationship already?  Is it inevitable?  Am I prepared?

Each of us has our own little worlds that we live in.  We want those worlds to be safe, warm and full of love.  My love for Mistress K. is undeniable and as deep as anything I know and feel.  I want to bring her pleasure in life.  I want for her to have access to and the ability to enjoy, as much pleasure in life as possible.  Not just sexual pleasures, but every pleasure that is available to her.  I trust Mistress K. to be a very good arbiter of common sense when it comes to determining which pleasures she can safely indulge in, and which ones she can't.  For example, there is pleasure in cake and pie.  Mistress K., I suppose, could decide that because eating cake and pie is indeed a pleasure, and because she is in charge of determining what pleasures she can indulge in, she can eat cake and pie as much as she wants without ramifications.  Right?  Of course not, and she, like any rational person, knows that. 

What about sex?  Ah, now that's a different story, right?  I mean after all, Mistress K. is among a select group of people in this world.  Like relatively few others, she is someone that lovingly owns the heart, mind and body of someone else, which of course means that she could have any kind of sex, anytime she wants, any way she wants, simply because she wants to.  She decides the if, the when, the how of sex.  She also is the one that decides the who.  How great is that? 

Like any other group of people, those of us the FLR/FLM world are sometimes subject to what is claimed to be "normal".  Newbies starting out are worried about whether or not they are "doing it right".  Experienced couples ask and are asked questions all the time, about "is it normal for us to do this, or normal to do that ....?"  Personally, I've never been a fan of worrying about where any of us actually do or should "fit in".  I get a bit weary at the natural inclination of people (me included) to constantly try to define everything into narrow definitions.  There are even those that will give unsolicited opinions of how you/we are doing it right or doing it wrong.  I have a commenter who is an anonymous "Mistress".  She will occasionally comment or email me to let me know that until Mistress K. requires me to consume my own cum, we really don't have a legitimate FLM because, well, you know, it's what everyone does in an FLM.  Although she's adamant about, she's pleasant enough and even humorous about it that I really can't take offence to it.  Besides, even if I did, unless a commenter is blatantly, obviously and needlessly offensive, I'll always leave their comments in place.  Thankfully, Mistress K. and I don't feel the need to allow anyone outside of our deep love for each other, to define the parameters that love.

Even though some things are never "always required" to define the kind of relationship Mistress K. and I have, there are undeniable commonalities to a D/s relationship.  Especially a Female Led D/s relationship.  Of course, one of those "not uncommon" things is for the Dominant Female to take on a male lover .....  be it a full-on cuckold relationship, with humiliation, forced bi and other things that serve to degrade and humiliate the submissive male;    or Her taking a random, nameless, faceless male, human sex toy, it's obviously not an uncommon thing in a FLM/FLR. 

That being said, there are many, many monogamous FLM's, and my marriage is one of them.  Neither Mistress K. nor I have previously expressed a desire in the past for a separate male lover to sexually service Mistress K.  We are both very, very protective of the core elements of our love, and would never do anything to risk that.  It's a key reason why we never actually did engage I a threesome with other women when we had the chances in the past.  Safeguarding our love. 

One of the effects on me that has evolved from our FLM is that is I get an ENORMOUS amount of joy and pleasure from seeing Mistress K. having intense sexual pleasure and orgasm.  It is a genuine thrill for me.  It really is.  I've even been able to have a ruined orgasm by simply watching my beloved wife having a orgasm.  I am also so grateful that Mistress allows me to see her have her orgasms.  I know that isn't always the case for many submissive husbands.  Witnessing her having an orgasm will usually put me into immediate and deep subspace.  Our evolution has brought me to now get as much sexual pleasure from her orgasms, as I could get from having one on my own.  It is just that much of a joy to be a part of and to witness my beloved Wife having such pleasure. 

One of the realities of a FLM, is daily teasing/edging, followed by orgasm denial. For many couples, it's a key component in their recipe for happiness.  I know it is in mine.  As such, the male is in a nearl constant state of arousal, which means that he often a hair trigger penis, and can usually come in a matter of seconds when his penis is pressed into service (pun intended).  I'm sure there are some men out there than can do it, ..... that can go from a teased/denied, constant state of edge-of-orgasm arousal, to a porn-star like man that can fuck as long as she wants, and cum on command.  For the rest of us mortal humans, that kind of thing is usually not possible. 

There are times when suddenly Mistress feels the desire to be fucked, good, hard and for as long as she wants. When the times comes, and because of my constant state of arousal, it usually requires some numbing cream, a cock sleeve and waiting time for the cream to numb the cock. Should she have to be concerned about her sub cumming without permission, or worse, having to stop altogether to avoid ejaculation? This doesn't seem fair for any Mistress not to have a hard cock available to fuck her like she wants.

Last night I was having many random, crazy dreams.  In one of them, Mistress K. was getting fucked by another man, she was loving every second of it.  Not only that, I was there, naked, sitting behind her, holding her legs apart.  Not only that, I helped this strange man him fuck my wife by grabbing and holding his cock, and guiding it into her pussy, then watched as he brought intense pleasure from being fucked long and hard.  (In my dream, he didn't have a big, giant cock like that depicted in the picture below, but there are only so many pictures of husbands holding their wife's legs apart so she can fucked, and except for the giant cock, it's pretty much how I remember the scene in my slumbering head. * smile)

Not only that, when recalling that portion of the dream, I got a huge erection, and then I got another huge erection telling Mistress K. about it.  Wait, what?  Did I just say that?  This is something new.

How could this be?  The last time I had a sex dream that included any other man, it caused me to wake up in a panic.  It was one of those .... "oh good, it was only a dream, but I still need some reassurance from you right now" kind of dreams.  And in this particular dream, all she did was barely handle a guy's cock that happened to be lying next to us in bed, for some reason. 

With these things in mind and being a bit jealous by nature, how could I go from near panic about a dream where Mistress K. briefly touches another man's cock, to waking up as hard as a rock and very  aroused because another man fucked her?  How could this be?  I'd say the biggest difference between the two "mind-fuck" dreams, was that the man in my latest dream was merely a faceless, nameless human sex toy.  There was no intimacy between him and my Mistress.  No kissing, no typical cuckold fodder about how I was a useless man when it came to sex.  There was none of that.  He wasn't there to steal her, or replace me in her life in any way.  Mistress seemed very intent on making sure I knew that, during the dream.  In fact, there was a great deal of gratitude and intimacy that was directed solely at me while she was being well fucked by this other man. 

Are we there already?  Are we at that milepost on our journey?  Are we growing up?  Are we growing into our journey?  Oh boy ..........  What's next?


  1. An interesting post! i can picture where you might be, and your wonder and concerns! Very interesting. Here, i do wonder if my Wife will tire of having me please her, only for Her to make me cum in my panties. Will She soon want more? Sometimes, i wonder if She has, or will find, my hidden web histories (She is better at computers than me, even though i am careful)... will She decide She wants more? Has She seen those few cucking videos i have watched? The feeling just expands as She finds She wants to go out for work and friend meetings more. i don't think She has any interest in cucking me, from our discussions, but one wonders how things just might change. Thanks again for your writing, sara

    1. My goodness ..... So many familiar things in your comment. Scary even. Although, I don't worry about having my computer history scrutinized by Mistress K. I have wondered some of the same things. The stereotypical "cuckold" scenario has no appeal for me and I believe the same is true for Mistress. Yes, I also wonder if and how things might change. I've been able to reconcile my arousal from my dream solely based on the pleasure that Mistress K. was able to receive from what amount to a nameless, faceless, emotionless cock that provided sexual pleasure. I'm certain things would be different if it included an emotional attachment to another man. Maybe I am being myopic, but the distinction is important.

    2. Thank you, SH! Glad to know i'm not alone, from my end.
      My Wife said before that She didn't have interest in another sexual relationship, but of course when you made me think about it, that was a while ago, and things have changed between our sexual relations over time. I too find the idea of Her getting rapt sexual attention is what is most attractive. In a real world thing, it would be scary as heck -- especially as you say with any emotional attachment. Maybe we are just too weak in a way, too. ;)

  2. Fantasies change.

    Realities change.

    Fitting your reality to a fantasy, though, is not something I'd recommend. (Not that you are asking for recommendations; I am merely speaking from experience.) What once panicked you may now turn you on, and vice versa.

    You identified intimacy as being the thing you don't want your wife to share with someone else. While I 'get' that, I'd also caution you to examine that fear very closely. My spouse used to think he'd like to see me with another man, as long as there was an absence of feeling between he (the other man) and I. But I find that insulting. The idea that I would/could just use someone as a battery-free sex toy is ludicrous. I care about people. I connect with people. And connecting via intercourse or other sexual activity is definitely a *connection* - and it's not one I'm interested in unless I *feel* something for the person I'm with. That feeling may be friendship or shared humor or a level of 'getting' one another that is amorphous and undefined, but for me, the feeling is there. And with feelings come intimacy.

    I point this out because in many FLRs, where the idea of a third is concerned, primary partners seem to forget that their wives are CARING people, and somehow the idea takes root that she could/should suddenly STOP being that way, and become an emotionless hole, willing to open her body to some random guy just to fulfill *his* (hubby's) fantasy.

    It doesn't paint her in a very flattering light, does it?

    Just think about that.

    1. Thank you so much for your incredibly thoughtful reply mrsfever. Yours was among the first blogs I followed when I started to be drawn to this lifestyle and I have always found your words to be incredibly insightful and helpful with all the other noise out there. I absolutely DO appreciate anything you have to say or may recommend.

      First, I'd like to make it clear that neither of us (certainly not me) have a fantasy of Mistress K. "being with" another man in the convetional sense of the words. That being said, Mistress K. and I have always had a bit of a disagreement (ever since we got together almost 20 years ago) as to whether or not there is a connection when two people have sex. Like you, I've always felt that sex, in and of itself, was a form of intimacy that required some level of connection, even arguably some level of "love". Mistress K., on the other hand, has always felt that there can be an emotionless connection between the two people that are having sex together. We have always enjoyed, and have protected very carefully, the intimate, true love connection that we each have for each other. Although Mistress K. feels the way she does, she doesn't and hasn't ever felt the need to prove that fact by encouraging emotionless sex with another person, by either of us. It was merely the way she was predisposed to thinking.

      Perhaps this was the reason that I was able to find an intense arousal about what had happened in my dream. Mistress K. is a loving, deeply caring person, for whom I would never dream of allowing her to feel or be perceived as an emotionless hole, especially since is not a fantasy of mine. That being said, I so very deeply do wish for Mistress K. to receive the kind of pleasures in life, sexual or otherwise, that she desires, or may come to desire. In the context of my dream, that is exactly what happened. Given our respective feelings on the topic of your comment, I know in my heart that what happened (even if it was just a dream) doesn't demean my beloved Mistress in any way, while at the same time it didn't brush up against the concept of there being an emotional connection with another man. In the dream, she simply wanted to get fucked good.

      In the context of your particular feelings on the subject, I wholeheartedly agree that for someone such as yourself, it doesn't paint the woman in a flattering light. Mistress K. has all but "cured" me from any topping from the bottom. I believe an example that is applicable in our lives would be .... I have always encouraged Mistress K. to take a female slave into her realm of Domination. I can honestly tell you that it IS indeed a fantasy of mine and although Mistress K. has been with other women in the past (before we got together), Mistress K. has made it clear that she has no interest in that scenario now. To your point, if she were to acquiesce merely in order to fulfill my fantasy in this regard, then yes, she would therefore be relegated to nothing more than a bit player in what amounted to a fantasy of mine. Not very flattering.

      mrsfever, please know that I so very much appreciate you taking the time to let me know your thoughts, and expressing your concerns. Who knows what, if anything, will ever come from this. For me, it was notable because there had never been a scenario before, dream or otherwise, where another mans cock pleasuring my wife had ever been something I could get behind. Even in the context of my desires for her to have/receive the pleasures in life that she may have. I am not projecting an ultimate desire for Mistress to have sexual relations with another man. I know that when Pandora's box gets opened, anything can happen.

      My very best to you and thank you again.


    2. Oh, I get that "no strings" sex can happen and that everyone has their own parameters within which they operate, based upon their individual perceptions of love, sex, and relationships.

      And I also 'get' that fantasies can sometimes leave us going, "WhaaAa...#$@!?" :)

      Admittedly, the content of your post triggered some responses in me that were based on my own "Whoaaaa! STOP!" experiences. Perhaps not your intention - it was just a dream, after all! - but, as another commenter mentioned below, a hot-button topic nonetheless.

      As you know from reading my blog, the mister and I have figured out our own form of non-monogamy, and *continue* to figure it (and other elements of our relationship) out in ways that work (for US) as we go. (And cuckolding is NOT it, at least not in any traditional sense.)

      Constant and consistent communication is really the key, no matter how your relationship is structured. And you seem to have a good handle on that.

    3. * a tip of the hat in your direction mrsfever

      Thank you!

    4. MrsFever, i have to say, you do give some things for me, at least, to think about. Thank you, sara

  3. I'm a cuckhold. And I can't imagine it any other way. We don't do the humiliation thing per se, but I do know that I can't possibly satisfy my wife sexually to the extent her partners can. On a date night, I send her out the door with a smile and a kiss and welcom her back home the same way.

    Strangely, it was never something I fantasized about nor was it something I thought I could handle. But as we decided to explore non-monogamy (and obviously she's the only one getting anything on the side since I'm locked up) it has become one of my pleasures.

    1. Thanks for your comment JMS. This whole topic is brand new territory for me. I want to be clear that I am not hoping for a cuckold experience, at least no in the typical/stereotypical sense. I have no desire to be demeaned, humiliated, mdae tot hink that I am not able to satisfy my Mistress sexually. I realize that being a submissive husband that is denied, teased, edged, etc., makes difficult, if not impossible to be also be the last-forever kind of male lover that Mistress K. sometimes wants. I also understand that this, in and of itself, creates a dynamic in our relationship that may lead to something else. We each have our boundaries/limits and even though I know that there are times when my beautiful wife would simply like to be taken and fucked hard and long, and even though I am not likely to be the person that can give her that (unless it is planned and numbing cream gets involved), we continue to safeguard those boundaries with our very being.

      Who knows where our journey will take us. I understand completely how a cuckold relationship can be an incredibly pleasurable component to a FLM, but it seems to me that it is only a "good" thing for people if both people genuinely get pleasure from it, like you do.

      Thank you for taking the time to stop by and contribute to my little blog here. I really appreciate it. I hope to "see" you here again soon.

  4. I think cuckolding is right for some couples, and definitely wrong for others. I believe a couple needs to be extremely close, in-love, and have incredibly good communication. And even with those things, there is risk. I've been my wife's cuckold for about 5 months and our marriage is as strong as ever. We've taken it slow, and it wasn't something we just jumped into. It was a topic for 6-7+ years and not even seriously considered until about 1 or 2 years ago. For us, it's been great fun and a nice added dimension to our marriage.

    1. HI Locked Husband, and thank you for your comment. I'm very happy for you that your marriage seems to be strengthened by your cuckold arrangement. I feel the need to say it again, I'm not hoping for a cuckold relationship in the stereotypical sense of the word. I don't think I could handle it, sending my wife off to make love to another man, again in the traditional sense of a typical cuck situation. My post was not intended to introduce the potential for that in our relationship but rather to say that it was the very time I had ever been subject to idea of another man's cock being used as a pleasure device for my wife. The nameless, faceless nature of the other man in my dream made it something I guess I could see as being another way to pleasure my Mistress sexually. Granted, it was just a dream and as such, it doesn't mean that it is something I am going to look to make happen in real life. Like I said, it was as if "he" was nothing more than a human sex toy for which my Mistress had no intimate connection with. However unlikely something like that would ever happen, I was able to wallow in the unmitigated pleasure she was receiving in my dream, and with her pointing all of her pleasures she seemed to be having toward me, it fit the criteria for something that is very important to me ... her pleasure and without crossing a boundary line.

      Pandora's box? Gosh I hope not.

  5. SHIP,
    The fantasy can be appealing, as fantasies are. The reality is you are playing with fire. Fire too often gets out of hand and consumes all in its path. Is a little excitement worth risking all you have? Is she worth so little? That is one of the things that will go through her mind.
    You speak of intimacy and that it bonds the two of you. It is this same intimacy she will have with another man and part of her will bond with him also.
    I made the mistake of not treating my wife as a special treasure in my past and almost lost her.
    She deserves better than that.
    You may want to challenge your limits but, the risk is too high and the danger too great.
    mrsfever had good advice above.

    1. Thank you my friend. Thank you for reaching out and for your wise words. I'm totally right there with you. I can't control my dreams and as such, I am able to make the distinction between reality and fantasy. That being, this is NOT a fantasy of mine. My goal is and always has been the joy and pleasure of life for my Mistress Wife. I don't not wish for her to feel the need to move toward another ma to satisfy her sexually. Not at all. She is worth EVERYTHING to me and I would never do anything to jeopardize that. However, the dream happened in the context that it did. As I am required to do, I immediately told Mistress K. about it and she was grateful that I told her about it. To not do so would be akin to lying. She was grateful that I did and saw it as a new, depended level of trust that I was at least subconsciously able to achieve.

      The nature of a Female Led Relationship is that the Female leads the relationship. I suppose that on some level, if Mistress K. felt strongly enough about a desire to take another lover to want to introduce it to our marriage, it would be troublesome to say the least. It would be something that is outside of our current boundaries and I do not see those boundaries changing. Neither does she.

      We've had opportunities to add others to our sex life in the past, and we quickly realized that it was indeed playing with fire and never acted on it. I am confident that none of this has changed.

      I agree my friend, she deserves the very best. My best. Had I the ability to not let that little movie play out in mind while I slept, it never would've happened. But it did. I believe that having revealed this to Mistress K. will allow us to be able to discuss it in the context of what both you and mrsfever have expressed, because it is that important to me. In case I haven't said well enough, I DO NOT WANT TO SHARE EVEN A LITTLE OF THE INTIMATE LOVE THAT I HAVE WITH MY WIFE. NONE! Sorry, didn't mean to shout. And to be clear, I always want to challenge my limits, but not that one!

      Thanks again my friend!

    2. SHIP,
      It is an honor to be called your friend.
      A good take away from this post is I believe you can see how many people care about you, your Mistress, and and your marriage.

    3. I am so very humbled by those words and by that thought DLsKnight. Thank you so much1

  6. SH. As much as I have come to love your blog I am a bit troubled by this entry. Has your Mistress expressed any desire for chucking? She is the head of you and your household. Are you taking the lead in this? How does that qualify as an FLR? Moreover your visiion/dream seems to objectify your Mistress. The cuckholding seems to be for your benefit - not hers. Even the photo that you include seems to show the woman in an objectified and submissive position.

    1. Hi Anonymous and thank you for honest comments. NO, Mistress K. has never expressed an interest in cuckolding. Neither have I! None of that has changed, I promise.

      It's clear that I failed to make it clear what was on my mind following my troublesome dream. The intended purpose of my post was to openly discuss how I was concerned. Concerned that for the first time ever, I got aroused by the notion of my Mistress having sexual pleasure with another man's cock. Yes, I was concerned because it included another man's cock! I have always felt so excited and aroused whenever Mistress K. is able to enjoy any level of sexual pleasure. I've even been conditioned by our FLM to genuinely be happy and aroused to get the majority of my own sexual pleasure by bearing witness to and participating in her sexual pleasure. I've often said it is the reason why my sex life over the past 4 years is better than any other time in my life. Pure, unmitigated sexual pleasure for me by seeing and giving her sexual pleasure. That has never included, even privately in my own mind, a desire to see her have sex with another man in addition to or in lieu of sex with me. That fact remains the same and always will!

      It's difficult to portray the flavor and proper context of what happened in my dream. Somehow there was none of the components that you, msfever, or DLsKnight warn about. Somehow in the dream, there was zero connection, on any level, between either of us and that robotic-like cock that was giving my Mistress pleasure. Somehow that was happening. I am not naïve enough to think that what may have happened in that dream is our should be something to pursue. It's not!

      T your point about the cuckold benefitting me, nor .... it doesn't. I don't ever want cuckolding to happen. Ever. I also would never objectify my beloved Wife. Again, in the context of what was happening, she was the one objectifying the nameless, faceless bloke that she derived her pleasure from. Her resulting joy and sexual pleasure that came from that was what I suppose aroused me, but only because there absolutely no emotional connection involved.

      Dreams are a motherfucker ....... Guh.

      Thank you again for your comments and your concern. I very much appreciate it. I suppose I should go back and remove the little picture talking about challenging limits. I can see how that would leave the impression that I am hoping that cuckolding might happen.

      Please don't be so troubled that you no longer come by and comment. Your participation means the world to me.



  7. Sub hub nice to see you posting again. I agree with some of this post each couple has to find what "they" want. Maybe I took this wrong but it seems you are topping from the bottom. Yes Mistress can do as she pleases but is this something that would please her or did you bring it up? Like so many others before I have sex with someone there has to be some type of feeling. Your Mistress from your past posts is no different. She is a loving caring person and is not about to spread her legs for any hard cock the comes along. Having said that cuckolding works for some but not all.

    1. Thanks so much archedone. I probably needed to do a better job explaining the post to begin with. Cuckolding is NOT something I want in my marriage. Not at all! I "brought it up" only because it was a dream that I had, and in that dream, something happened that never happened before. Some here have commented on the picture that used and from it thought that the woman in is was being objectified. That wasn't my intention. When I found that picture, my thought was the woman in the picture was directing things, getting what she wanted, and as such was anything but being objectified. Perhaps that's not really what the picture truly does portray. I need to get rid of it!

      Thanks as always bud.


    2. After reading all the comments you got and your reply to the comments I now understand better. Sorry I took it the wrong way my friend. You do have a loving and caring Mistress as do I and that is something so many want and don't have.

  8. Heated topic for sure! The intimate love you have for your Mistress is so very familiar to me and to my intimate love I have for my Man. When we became D/s, I became oddly territorial over my Man. Not jealous, territorial. My life now served a new purpose- to SERVE my Man. I became territorial over that service.

    This dynamic doesn't inevitably lead to me not being enough. It is O/our responsibility to respect each other's needs and emotional limits. Is there room for an extension of our needs to include others in our bedroom? Maybe. But, like you and Mistress K, my Man and I share an emotional limit we would never cross. We also had the opportunity a few times many years ago, and choose not to. That doesn't take away from our relationship evolving to something new and different each day.

    All that being said.... I think I had a mini moment of panic for you as I read your words and somehow fast forwarded to a post of hurt and confusion after the choice had been made. Blogland paints the sexiest picture of threesome's (the photo you found is proof of that! I want to be that lucky girl!!). But, beyond the hormone filled wet panty pictures is a Husband and a wife (and in Mistress K's home, a Wife and her husband). Neither my Man or I have a kink that includes me being not enough. It would break me.

    In the end- you cannot control your dreams and as you said, you certainly cannot keep them from your Mistress. Interesting post ship, and some great thoughts from your readers!

    1. Pearl, I've wanted to reply to your thoughtful comment ever since the minute it popped up here. Real life has prevented me from doing that. I apologice for the delay. So here goes .....

      Yes, you are correct. We have no way of controlling our dreams. To that end, I've never really been a fan of using too much energy to try and define what our dreams mean, good or bad. When I have a terrifying dream, after feeling relieved that it was in fact a dream, I'm kind of stressed about it for the first hour or so after waking up. Much like I was in the previous I said I had where another was laying naked, next to us in our bed.

      I am certain that I may have unintentionally misled (not on purpose of course) my readers into perhaps thinking that I, in some passive or even aggressive way, was wanting, hopeful for, looking for, projecting, planting the seed for a scenario with which a cuckold relationship could be introduced into my marriage, or some variation thereof. I need to continue to make it clear that NO, THIS IS NOT THE CASE!!!. Someone else had even likened my post to playing with fire, to which I couldn't agree more, and I accept full responsibility for that. I don't like fire or the absolute and utter destruction that can come from fire. In the dream (which is hardly akin to reality), the "other man" who had his cock inside Mistress K., was somehow nameless, faceless and had no other impact on what had was unfolded before the two of us. At the end of the day, the fact that ALL of the intimacy and pleasure being derived from that nameless, faceless mans cock doing it's thing to Mistress K., was for the benefit of Mistress K. only. She was focusing and sharing ALL of that pleasure with me, in my direction and in an intimate an beautiful fashion. As such, I was able to derive my pleasure solely from her obvious pleasure, without regard to it's source, like I always do. I suppose this was only possible because it was clear that there was no connection whatsoever between Mistress K. and the man, no this penis. Well, except of course for that one other thing that was directly connecting with her. *smile

      This man, no this penis, although technically real, might as well have been a dildo that attached to a mannequin. I suppose, in some way, that fact alone allowed for me not to worry about the normal jealousy that would otherwise have prevented such an act in the first place.

      As I mentioned before, anytime in the past where there even been a remote chance that the sexual inclusion of another man might possibly be involved, I awoke to sweating and panting, and I don't mean the good kind.

      I appreciate the sentiment about the possibility of you have a mini moment of panic. That means you care and I so very much appreciate you for that.

      thanks for your support dear friend.

      I should make it clear that in the dream, it was Mistress K.'s idea for this man, no this penis to be a part of the pleasure she was seeking at the time. I'm not certain I had mentioned that in the post or in any subsequent comments.

  9. Very thoughtful and descriptive post sub hub. When I read this yesterday I thought that the comments were going to light up, and so they have. Not just because the idea of cuckolding is omnipresent in the FLM world and everybody in this community pretty much has to form an opinion about it but it would be a seismic event in the lives of 2 people that many of your followers have found an affinity for and enjoy the sincerity and true heart that is ever present in your writing.

    I have been following for less than a year and would hate to see anything impede this wonderful thing you guys share. I also feel confident that neither of you would let anything mess it up. Cuckolding is a fantasy for most of us and boy is it ever titillating! That picture you found.... oh my my!

    Enjoy what you have, enjoy your fantasies and enjoy whatever your benevolent Mistress brings your way!
    Thanks for sharing you dreams and thoughts :)


    1. sublove, thank you so much for words of love and support for Mistress K. and I. You have summed it so very well and accurately. I appreciate that because for some reason i find myself searching for the words to tell everyone that .... NO, I'M NOT TRYING TO HAVE ANOTHER MAN HAVE SEX WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE.... you know without it coming off as a "thou doth protest too much" kind of thing.

      "....would hate to see anything impede this wonderful thing you guys share." My/our appreciation for this sentiment is hard to put into words and i am so very grateful that you have. Thank you!

      You advice, as always, is sound and it is exactly what I intend to do. We adore and cherish what we have together, will continue to enjoy our fantasies and I intend fully to dutifully enjoy every moment my benevolent Mistress steers us two love birds toward!

  10. Dear SHIP - thank you for your responses to the many comments made to this posting. I was one who expressed some concern over it.

    I think it is only fair that I tell you how much I have appreciated your blog over the last few years.

    Your blog entries reveal the joy and fulfillment that can be found in a man submitting himself in servitude to a woman. For most men this idea of submission is a scary thing - it's not how we were brought up. Yet for many of us we have this deep seated need to become slaves to our wives. Your blog has demonstrated that taking that step of submission, of revealing our true selves to our women, of allowing ourselves to be lead, directed, held accountable, and punished when needed by the women we love, can complete us as men and bring great joy to ourselves and our mistresses. thank you

    1. Thank you tom for your incredible words. So true. there is one person on this planet that I am openly and devotedly submissive with, and that of course is me beloved Mistress Wife. The love of my life. And yes, that continued and deepening love that comes from that does indeed complete me as a man.

      Thank you so much. Have an awesome day my friend!

  11. SHIP, haven't you been down this road in your mind before? I thought you already came to the conclusion adding another wasn't for you two.

    Are these thoughts a sign "you are growing up" as you say or ones in which you're willing to risk forever losing what you have? Remember, if you spill soup you can clean it up but everyone that saw you spill it will always remember you did. Point being, you can never undo fully what you did.

    My opinion: your wife is gorgeous. She loves you. There are 10,000 men who would kill to have with their wife what you have with yours. Don't tempt her to want another.

    1. Thank you my dear friend. You've obviously picked up my telekinetic signals I was broadcasting in your direction, hoping to receive a comment from you, laced with your wisdom.

      It's clear that this post has left many with the impression that that it is a latent desire of mine for their to be another man in the sexual equation with my wife. OMG, nothing is further from the truth. I promise. The intended purpose of the post was to try and explain the complexity of it all because of my erection that came as a result of the experience in the dream. I am comfortable in the knowledge that my arousal comes SOLELY from the fact that Mistress was having such a wonderful sexual experience in that (f'ing) dream, and that none of it appear to be based in the fact that it was a live penis ... from another man. Like I said in another reply to a comment, for all intents and purposes, it might as well have been a dildo attached to a mannequin.

      That being said, it was just a dream and as such, doesn't bear evidence that there is any desire, on my part, for her to want another. That would crush me if it turned out to be true.

      I tried to portray my wonder, or concern about whether or not there is a perceived logical step for this kind of thing in a FLM. My wife has steadfastly held that including another man in our relationship is not at all something she even remotely desires, and cannot and will not happen. When I told her of the dream, and my subsequent erection that came from it, in it's proper context, she told me that she was proud of me for the confidence and trust that I have in her. She went on to reiterate that, even though it was a dream of mine and not hers, I want not something that she has latent desires for.

      I have no plans to hope for, explore, or even wonder if she would be tempted to someday want another. My disclosure of my private dream to the woman I trust and love more than any other was something I felt a natural obligation to do because I think keeping it from her would've been deceitful. I've told her about scary dreams I have had in the past that included the another man in a sexual context, each time revealing openly my fears that resulted from those dreams. I guess the fact that was absolutely no intimate or even human connection to the other involved allowed me to share in the joy she was having in the dream. Is such a thing even possible in real life? Probably not, but dreams aren't always realistic.

      I hope that makes sense and for whatever it is worth, I hope you have the confidence in me to know that I would hold on to every ounce of love and affection I have with my wife, with my life.

      Thank you for being there for me dear friend. You know how much I appreciate you!


    2. Everyone needs a pep talk now and then. :)

  12. Sometimes dreams and fantasies are just that, and not something you'd want to try in real life.

    But there are some of us who have tried itfound that extremely strong love and devotion to each other doesn't always mean there must be monogamy.

    Like you say, we all do it a bit differently.

    1. thank you so much a_k and I agree, to each their own. I'm happy for you that your love and devotion is enhanced by the inclusion of others. I get it how that can be a great thing for some people, and for you I fully support it. I'm certain though that Mistress K. and I will likely not be venturing in that direction anytime soon. It something we both agreed in the past we are interested in pursuing. I don't believe a dream that I had will change that any more than dreaming about winning the lottery effects the likely of that too.

      Thank you again for your support and thoughtful reply.

  13. WOW!! I can't believe I missed this post but I have only been popping in and out of blogger recently. I do want to comment but want to think about this and maybe read it again to put my thoughts together. Much love to you! xo

    1. Finally! I was wondering when I'd hear from you!!! *smile looking forward to your comment. I was going to check in on you and while I was at it, invite you into this fray!

      Thanks for the love. So much back at ya!

    2. So I'm back. First, I do hope you aren't too hard on yourself for not lasting as long as you think you should be able to. Being kept on edge without many orgasms is sure to create this situation and your Mistress is well aware of that. If it truly bothered her, I would think she might change her approach.

      Now, whether or not inclusion of another man ever happens, I think your dream is merely an acceptance, a deepening of your submission so to speak. To me, it is a huge testament to the trust that you have. For me, I have begun fantasizing about Heron pleasing another, or being pleased himself by another. And I believe that my mind only allows me to go to that place because of the deep trust that I have in our relationship. I am sure it is the same for you. But we have talked and it will not happen. He may be willing to share me but he isn't willing to share himself.

      What I have found, the longer we have been on this path, is that my mind keeps opening to experiences I never thought it would be open to.

      Sounds like you are in a wonderful place. Hugs to you my friend!

    3. Hello old friend. Thanks for taking the time to give your thoughts. You know that I appreciate it so very much.

      You're absolutely right about Mistress changing her approach if keeping me on the edge, and the associated hair trigger that comes with it was indeed a problem.

      I completely agree with you on the deeper acceptance of my submission and in particular, the amount of trust that exists in our marriage. Without that deep level of trust, everything we do together currently wouldn't be possible. Like you, my mind keeps opening to new and different experiences and since all of those thoughts are directed at the pleasure of Mistress K., it is inevitable that such a dream/thought might enter my mind, however unlikely it is to ever happen.

      We indeed are in a wonderful place and I couldn't be happier, or more secure in the love and trust that exists.

      Much Love and thank you again!


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