Thursday, October 29, 2015

What is a benefit of a Female led Marriage?

I've been asked that question before.  I've seen that question asked, and it's been debated from all angles, by many different people with a variety of agendas in mind.

I ran across one of my very favorite quotes.and until I saw it again today, I only ever thought it was very clever and funny.  Now, I think it is meaningful as well.  here it is;

“The problem is, God gave man a brain and a penis and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
-   Robin Williams
Often people will try to define for everyone within listening (reading) distance, exactly how things should go.  if it is something like a FLM, people will debate whether it truly is or not because the people involved do, or don't do, this or that.  Whatever this or that may be. 
Back to Robin William's joke.  Yes it's clever and funny ... but it's also true.  For so many men, this very conundrum is absolutely true.  I, on the other, am immune from this problem.  In fact, my FLM is the very reason that I am not subject to this phenomenon for one very simple, convenient reason .... I don't control my penis.  The second Mistress K. accepted my submission, I gladly offered and she happily accepted the responsibility and control of my penis.  As a covenant to our relationship (and as of a year ago our renewed marriage vows), my penis is completely and utterly controlled by Mistress K.  Access to it, it's use for ANYTHING other than it's cleaning or for urination, is absolutely prohibited without permission and supervision.  As such, the blood in my body can be (and is) solely dedicated to running my brain, and not my penis.  When mistress decides that my penis is to be used, the need for the appropriate amount of blood to run my brain disappears because she is controlling things then, and therefore can be totally dedicated to running my penis which makes her happy.
I am an Alpha male of every aspect o my life except the obvious exception.  Not owning my sex, my penis, my orgasms, greatly minimizes the chances that I will fuck up in my life because that should rightfully be dedicated for use in my brain, isn't being diverted to my penis. 
When you think about it ... God was so smart ... wasn't she?


  1. sub hub this post fits in with your last post of a true submissive. We live a little different FLM. Mistress R has discussed a cage for me and together we have looked at them on line. I told her at the time that to cage me or not is her decision and at this point she has not told me to buy one. I also only cum when she wants me to. But in our case she loves to fondle and tease my cock getting me to the point of climax then stopping and starting all over again until she lets me cum. For her she loves to see my cock squirting so she enjoys that view often. As I'm only allowed to wear panties in the house she can always see if I have an erection or not and very few times do I get one without her telling me to. Having said that when my head is between her legs enjoying her taste yes I'll get erect and she will either snap the head with her finger to make it go down or allow me a climax. I've told her I only get erect doing that because her pussy is so beautiful and I love to serve her.

    1. Thanks archedone. I enjoy hearing about your FLM.

  2. Hello Sub Hub,
    Controlling the male penis is essential in any FLR. It's the essence of discipline. If a woman can't control what a man does or doesn't do with his penis she really isn't in charge no matter how often she spanks him. Discovering Jay's out of control masturbation was a turning point for us. That evolved into complete orgasm control ( no cages) He cums when and if I give him explicit permission and masturbation is strictly forbidden ( and severely punished ) Getting control of Jay's bottom with spanking allowed me to get control of his cock as well. I still do plenty of spanking but my control of his cock is the key to the success of our FLR.

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Marisa. I completely agree. Control of access, use and pleasure of the cock is absolutely essential in a FLR/FLM. There have been some posts and comments on other blogs debating as to whether not a submale should have his orgasms controlled. I can't imagine how a successful FLR/FLM could exist if I were to be allowed to masturbate and orgasm whenever I wanted. I believe it explicitly defines the control of the relationship being in the "subs" hands. Literally. Since beginning our FLM, I have had so very few orgasms, and most of those are of the ruined variety. I can tell though, our marriage has never been better, and the sex that I have had since then has been soooo muchbetter than any sex I have had prior to giving up control of my cock and orgasms. The overwhelming majority of the sex we have is Mistress having an orgasm, and me having the honoring of either participating or just watching. Either way, it is a beautiful, almost spiritual thing to witness my Mistress having an orgasms. I once was able to have an orgasm (permission was granted) simply by viewing Mistress having one. There was zero stimulation to my penis.

    2. I allow Jay to cum about twice monthly.Some wives might think that's too often. But there is some medical evidence that men need to ejaculate regularly to maintain health. Equally important,I believe it is not the number of times he cums that matter but that he has thoroughly internalized the message that he is forbidden to cum without my explicit permission and he is never to masturbate or ask to masturbate. As long as we are clear on that I am comfortable letting him cum when he is behaving and the moment is right.

    3. Marisa, you know best. At the end of the day, if cumming twice a month is what you want, then it is the best thing. I understand what you mean about it being healthy to ejaculate regularly. Mistress had initiated a monthly milking (2nd Monday of every month) with the primary purpose being to empty me of my ejaculate. She will sometimes incorporate play into it and if so, it ends up as a ruined orgasm. But mostly it is a business-like process with the goal being to empty my semen.

      I agree, it isn't important how many times a sub male ejaculates. What is important is the knowledge that we are forbidden to cum. For me ... I am forbidden from orgasm and touching myself sexually (anywhere, not just my penis). That being said, i do masturbate a lot because Mistress K. enjoys watching me edge myself for her. There are times where I am required to self edge during the day every 30 or 60 minutes. yes, all day! My balls just ache on those days but you know what, I have learned to yearn for that ache. She also enjoys watching me masturbate, but almost never will she allow me to orgasm that way. And god help me if I should have an accident.

      I love seeing your comments here and the other blogs that you like to frequent. You sound like a wonderful person and and a skilled dominant. Thank you again for stopping by.

    4. This Sunday it will have been 42 days for me and the first opportunity for my Wife Mz. C to unlock me. God am I ready! Mz. C does not have me orally please her during my long lock ups, but I wish she would. I really yearn for it. If she were to have me orally please her it would not only remind me that she is my superior and owns me, but it would double my desire.
      The longest she has kept me locked is 59 days and ironically that's how old I am. I can't help but wonder if next year she will set me a new record of 60 days?
      I love her so much more now that she has complete control of my little penis and exploits it. If she had not taken control of it away from me it probably would have gotten me into trouble by now. I don't think she'll ever allow it to be free.

  3. Hi sub hub, I love how you see the good of your relationship, and I think your Mistress must be proud of having such a dedicated submissive. I also enjoyed how you put this into such a sort of sacred kind of agreement, which is something I get so well because being submissive within the relationship is not for the sex, it is about being together and how we live.




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