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Monday, April 10, 2017

Having friends in the lifestyle

Last night Mistress K. and I had a rare opportunity to relax.  Mistress K. was sitting at the counter of the kitchen, enjoying a glass of wine (or two) while watching me prepare dinner.  It was a lovely.  We talked about everything an nothing .... just catching up.  We talked a little about something Mistress K. had said over the last week and that was she intended for us to review and replace our list of rules that we developed in the very beginning of our dynamic.  She believes that she has a much broader scope of what it means and takes to be a Mistress Wife in Female led marriage.  I asked her what she had in mind, and were there things in our current contract that she didn't like, or wanted to add.  She said "yes" but she didn't know exactly what those things might be and that we would develop this new agreement over time.  You see, she didn't want to find herself under the pressure of another unnecessary deadline to get something done and wanted to wait to really consider making changes once the kids were done with school.  So we would be developing our new agreement then.

Also during the discussion I made mention that I often wished that we had friends that were not only aware of our lifestyle, but also led the lifestyle we lead.  She immediately agreed that it would be wonderful to have friends that we actually enjoyed on a level that wasn't just having a FLM in common.  It would be nice to be able to speak openly and freely about the dynamics that each couple had in common.  I hope to make that happen someday.  I know that I thoroughly enjoy hearing about the time that other FLM couples spend together.  It must be a very freeing feeling.

16 comments:

  1. Yes speaking honestly with friends would be so good. Mind you scary too.

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    1. Hi submanhub. Hope you are well. .... thanks as always for commenting. I understand the "would be so good" part, but what is the scary part?

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  2. Setting new rules and having new experiences can be very exciting. I'm sure you are interested in what she has in mind. I agree with her she should take her time and be sure of the road she wants to go down. Maybe she will consider your idea of meeting with other like minded people.
    archedone

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    1. You're always there with a comment and support archedone. I really appreciate that!

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  3. Hi Sub hub, I love that Mistress K is considering where she wants to take your relationship in the future, exciting times ahead!

    How great it would be to have friends you can be completely open with and talk freely about your relationship dynamic with.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. I know Roz, it would be awesome to have friend (people we actually like as people and not just because they are FLM, as Mistress K says). Being able to demonstrate my love and devotion to my Mistress K. in the presence of others would be the epitome of freedom.

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  4. "I often wished that we had friends that were not only aware of our lifestyle, but also led the lifestyle we lead. She immediately agreed that it would be wonderful to have friends that we actually enjoyed on a level that wasn't just having a FLM in common. It would be nice to be able to speak openly and freely about the dynamics that each couple had in common. "

    I have sorta had this happen in real life. Became friends with a male sub that enjoyed the female dominant lifestyle. He was a bit of a femdom evangelist, and would actually cite studies of biological populations (I think bonobos) where when the females were in charge of the society, things were more harmonious. That was a bit too much for me, but to each his own.

    I did up meeting his wife (my wife knew about it) as I had some bartending skills and he was throwing her a big event party. So I bartended for her and he had a male stripper over. Pretty hot idea, actually. I didn't really talk to her much at all, she was with her girlfriends enjoying the stripper and drinks. But that was close...

    I did go out with him alone a few times and we discussed their lifestyle, what they are into. It was pretty freeing.

    Fast forward to recent times, I have chatted with a few cuckold husbands, and it's kinda nice to feel alone in my kinks. Have not met the hotwives yet. But I really would like to have a situation where we can talk openly about the wife being the focus of the couples sex life, how male orgasm denial works for them, about the challenges of finding a bull, etc. Very high on my list!

    Cheers

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    1. Thanks so much for sharing that wonderful story. I hope someday I/We can enjoy the same thing.

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  5. Might I suggest that you explore FetLife. Although I am not (yet) in a committed relationship -- as you are so fortunate to be -- it is my connection with other like-minded people where I live, and it affords me with the opportunity to serve women at social events, such as Femdom Teas.

    I have already perused the event listings for Phoenix, and you will find a number of opportunities to meet others who share your interests.

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    1. I'm already active on FetLife but not to search for anyone to join us. It isn't finding someone but more the idea and then the approval of Mistress K to make friends with others. Look me up on FetLife and say hi

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  6. Hi sub hub

    If that time ever occurs let me know as it would be great to develop a social acquaintance with another couple.

    As is usually the case I'm more enthusiastic than she is and it would be wonderful to be around a couple that are both comfortable in their roles.

    We're in the Northeast Valley.

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    1. Thanks for your comment DO. I think it would be great to develop such a relationship as well. I appreciated your email and replied in kind. I'm looking forward to hearing from you. We live in the NE valley as well, so ...... who knows?

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  7. Hi, first time here. Great Blog! Anyway, as to your point: it's probably easier than you think as long as you both want it....which obviously is the case. Search local clubs/munches as well as the online community. You'll be surprised at what you find. Good luck.

    Also....you mention willingness to receive e-mail, but I can't find a contact or profile link. Am I missing it? Thanks.

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    1. Our email addys are at the bottom under "contributors". Click on my name or Mistress K and it takes you to a page that has a link "email". If not mine is Subhubphx@gmail.com and hers is Subhubsgoddes@gmail.com.

      Thanks for the kind words. It's something we both wish we had but haven't yet made the decision to seek such friends.

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  8. Finding like minded friends in the same scene is a beautiful thing. I often wax poetic about us hosting flr dinner parties but not only is it a question of finding the people to attend but also time where we won't be interrupted by roommates. But then, perhaps, having a very flr dinner while roommates are likely to come by would be interesting too. After all, all our roommates know of our flr dynamic. ;)


    Good luck

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    1. Hello old friend. Thank you for your support, comments and wisdom. Like most of us (sub-husbands) I relish the chance to exist in my natural sub state in the presence of other, while my Wife is able to exist in hers, in the presence of like-minded others. Presently, I can only imagine what that feeling would be like.

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