Chastity - Caged or uncaged, it's a powerful force

In my last blog entry I spoke about a blog that I came across that I really enjoy.  The basics theme of the blog has to do with the real benefits that a couple gets when they live a life wherein the woman is the dominant and the man is submissive, and when the man gives control over his penis, sexual activity and orgasms to the woman in his life.  The benefits for real, long lasting and allow for the man and woman to life a deeply loving and long existence together.

In the beginning of our relationship, Mistress K. had me wear a chastity cage whereas now, I am in complete chastity without the use of a cage.  I'm on the honor system and so far (knock on wood) it has worked.  My ability to refrain from engaging in any unauthorized sexual activity without the use of a cage is something I am very proud of, and something that Mistress K. very proud of me.  We still have the cage, but now Mistress K. will only make me wear as punishment if she is especially disappointed in my behavior.  

Mistress K. and I believe in it so much that we used it as the basis for subtle decorating ideas in our bedroom.  This is a picture of what it looks like directly above the headboard of our bed.  

Clearly the one on the far left need to be straightened.  I'll get right on that.  Every night when I go to bed, I find myself taking a glance at these lock and keys knowing what they represent in my marriage.  I guess its a more subtle way of having the tradition that Notre Dame Football players have when they leave the locker for the field of play.

Maybe it's time to be less subtle and start tapping the pictures before I go sleep every night. 

Nonetheless, enforced chastity of the husband, in whatever form works for you, is an amazing thing.  Something which those that aren't familiar have a hard time understanding why ... until they have the opportunity to either learn more about how it works and why, experience it first, or both. I encourage every man and woman to consider it and to arm yourself with thoughtful, meaningful information about it.  Such as in this blog   https://evolvingyourman.com/

Blue Balls

 

It may sound crazy, but I have the epitome of aching blue balls and I love how it feels!  The dull ache that rests inside my pants is a constant reminder of the object of my emotional, spiritual and lustful desires.

 

On Friday I posted about how Mistress K. instructed me to masturbate to the edge every hour, on the hour, for the entire day.  Right up until bedtime.  I had no idea what, if anything would come of it in the sex play department but I found out as soon as we got into bed.  NOTHING!  Mistress wanted nothing more than for me to cuddle and nuzzle her while she fell quietly to sleep i our marital bed.  I asked if I could have relief then and she quietly said no.  "This is not the time .... now go to sleep "

 

Saturday was a day filled with busy family and parenting stuff, all day and night.  Apart from me walking over to her at various times during the day, to nuzzle in her neck and to tell her that I loved her, there was no physical interaction romantically or sexually.

 

Sunday?  Sunday?  Sunday was quite a bit different.  Mistress awoke about 7:45 in the morning.  When I heard her rise, I scurried to retrieve her coffee as I do every morning.  I handed it her and she was still very bleary eyed and sleepy.  Her long straight red hair was a disheveled tangled mess that half covered her face.  She was wearing her short little nightie that although isn't designed to be sexy but rather comfortable, I think it is sexy as hell.  I held her tight, kisses her face and neck and took in the body aroma that is uniquely her and declared my daily devotion to her.  She then hurried off to the restroom.

 

When she returned, she had shaken off the sleepiness and walked over to me sitting in the chair at the computer and began to kiss my neck.  She reached down and started to rub me through my shorts and gave me my instructions for the day.  She said "beginning at 8 this morning, you are to edge yourself every half hour for the entire day".  She grabbed my face, looked me in the eye and asked me if I understood my instructions.  I said "Yes maam".  "Good boy" and with that she kissed me softly then went to the kitchen to make breakfast for the kids.  She got 5 feet away then returned and said "oh, and you'll be wearing frilly panties all day".  She kissed me again and then left. 

 

EVERY HALF HOUR!!!!!  We went to bed at 10:30 that night.  Some quick math will tell that during the day on Sunday, I brought myself to the edge 29 times.  Yes .... 29 times.  She didn't come right out and say it, but she eluded to the fact that at the end of the day that I would be separated from the fluid that was gathering in my balls.  When we finally got into bed (she had to wake me up from the couch), she turned to me and started kissing me softly and saying what a good boy I was.  She started rubbing my soft cock and in no time i was all revved up in anticipation of, well, I didn't;t actually know, but i was certain it would be something.  Would she just drain me to ease the ache?  Would she stroke me until I couldn't hold it any longer and feign being disappointed that I came without permission?  I was pretty certain that she wasn't going to allow me to enter her because she knew that with all of that edging, I'd go off before I was able to get the whole head in. 

 

She stroked me to the edge 3 or 4 more times to the point i was begging her to allow me to ejaculate.  I wasn't asking to orgasm, I was begging to be drained.  She kissed me softly, held my face and quietly said no.  Now is not the time, and then rolled over and instructed me to cuddle her.  For the next 10 minutes I begged, whimpered, begged some more in desperate hope that she would acquiesce

and allow me to drain my balls.  She would have none of it and finally had to sternly tell me that if she had to say no one more time, I would be punished right then! 

 

Which brings us to today.  This morning, i was noticeably pouty about the fact that I was so frustrated about being denied the previous night.  She made a very subtle warning that this sort of behavior was not going to be tolerated ... at all!  I got the message real quick and apologized for being pouty.  A short time later, after bringing her a fresh cup of coffee and while she was facing the mirror putting on her makeup, I knelt behind her, slowly lifted her nightie and placed tender soft kisses on her gorgeous bottom and thanked her for her strength and for allowing me to be owned by her.  She informed that today I was to edge myself every 90 minutes throughout the day and then she handed me the panties that she wanted me to wear for the day.  I took the panties, said "Yes Mistress" and then thank her before leaving her to finish what she was doing.

 

Being in this state of unbelievably constant state of desire has allowed me to remember that it is not at all about my desire, or whether or not i think i should be allowed to cum, ruined or otherwise.  it is all about her and if having do this makes her happy, then it most certainly makes me happy. 

Would Love your advice

Hi everyone.  I hope you all had a wonderful and safe 4th of July weekend.  Mistress K., the kids and I all had a great time in the mountains of Arizona and are now safely back home in the Valley of Sun (heat).

Being away like we were, surrounded with family and friends at all times, meant that our alone time was essentially non-existent.  That obviously meant that there was no time for US, to do, you know , the things that a Dominant Wife and submissive husband like to do sometimes.  Purely vanilla all weekend long!

After we got home late last night, unpacked the car, settled the kids for bed, we finally got to be naked and alone.  I was laying in bed already when Mistress K. came into the bedroom, went to the closet and a few minutes later, emerged, tired and ready to get some sleep.  The only light in the room was the TV and when she walked in front of it to get into bed, wearing only a black thong, she looked absolutely gorgeous.  One of the favorite parts of her body (her torso) was illuminated by the dim light of the TV and I instantly got hard.  Even though I was already half asleep, I immediately got hard just by the sight of her nearly naked body.  She was checking her phone before putting it on the charger and then climbed into bed and ordered me to cuddle (spoon) her.  I immediately did so, pressing my hard cock against the other favorite part of her body ... her ass. 

When she realized that she had forgotten to set her alarm, she shifted and moved to reach for her phone on the nightstand.  By doing so, she stretched her arms to reach for the hone, rolling slightly onto her tummy, exposing her beautiful back and ass to me.  While setting her alarm, I couldn't resist so I started rubbing her ass and back and started kissing her all over.  Something came over me and I started to act in a dominant fashion by telling her (not asking her) that I was going to fuck her right then.  I started thrusting my cock into the fleshly part of her bottom, mockingly fucking her while she fiddled with her phone.  When she finished and rolled onto her back, I "ordered" her to remove her panties and spread her legs.  She just looked at me.  Not defiant or disappointed that I was assuming a somewhat dominant role for a moment, but just looking at me.  I immediately just pulled her panties down and removed, throwing them to the floor beside the bed.  I "ordered" her open her legs, not knowing how she would respond to me talking to her like this.  Almost immediately she opened her legs with a smile on her face.  I grabbed her wrists in one hand and held them above her head and positioned myself to enter her.

I had been without much sex for almost two weeks, save for a few stolen moments when Mistress would stroke my cock through my shorts, or the day last week when Mistress ordered me to edge myself at (am, noon and 3pm precisely, regardless of where I was that day.  Being a chaste husband and having very few orgasms, I am usually in what amounts to a constant state of arousal.  Just the way Mistress K. likes to keep me.  It's July and so far this year I have had only 2 real orgasms and probably as little as 10 or 12 ejaculations (ruined orgasms).  There are times that I know Mistress K. wants to be taken and just fucked.  Fucked hard.  This was one of those times.  The downside of being chaste and in a constant state of arousal is that I can be brought to the edge of orgasm in a very short time.  After a short time of slowly moving my cock inside of restrained Mistress, the need to orgasm came rushing toward me and I had to stop in order to avoid an unauthorized orgasm.  I tried to start again and last longer but it just wasn't going to happen.  The disappointment on Mistresses face was obvious even though she did her best not to show it.  I offered to get "pinky" (our cock sleeve) and put it on so I could fuck her longer, but she said no.  She just ordered me to retrieve her panties so she could put them back on.  After helping her back into her panties, she said "that's all for you tonight so lay down and go to sleep". 

So, what advice do I need?  Well, if you haven't figured it out already, I need your advice on how to be both chaste and in a constant state of arousal, while also being able to satisfy my Mistress with my cock when she has the desire to be fucked, without having to stop to avoid orgasm.  Stamina! 

My friends ... what advice to you have for me to be able to give Mistress the good hard fucking she wants/needs/deserves, without being a typical feeble male that wants to ejaculate too soon?  I know that this very conundrum is the reason that Dominant wives will often cuck their husbands, or otherwise take on other lovers ... and this seemingly natural progression is what I hope to avoid.  This morning Mistress and I talked again about "cock therapy", which is Mistress K.'s idea to help prevent premature ejaculation.  If you don't already know, Mistress K.'s "cock therapy" goes like this ....  Mistress K. will give a number.  Say that number is 100.  I am then required to give Mistress K. as many full thrusts as I can leading up to that number, without stopping.  Let's say I get to 25 but need to stop in order to avoid cumming.  That leaves 75 ... the number of hard swats I will receive from Mistress' paddle.  After the paddling, I am immediately required to make another attempt, with the same outcome.  We have used "cock therapy" in the past and it was beginning to work, especially at the time when Mistress K. decided that if she was going to go through the trouble of paddling me, each swat was gong to be meaningful  (ouchy). 

Anyone have any advice for me?  I would especially love to hear from Mistresses out there that very well could be having to deal with the same issue.

FLR coming into their own

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Just returned

Hi everyone.  I hope each of you had a lovely weekend.  Our family just returned from another visit to the mountains of Arizona where we really enjoy going in the summer.  Gets hot in Phoenix in the summer you know!

While there, we stayed with friends and there were kids running about as well.  There was a particular moment where we would have 15 minutes or so of known alone time.  I was in the garage on my way into the house when Mistress opened the door, poked her head out and said "get hard and come put yourself inside".  At first I didn't think I heard her correctly because I wasn't expecting it so when she repeated herself, the getting part was accomplished in about 2.3 seconds.

Once inside, I found her in the bedroom was had just removed her pants and was lowering her panties.  Side note .... seeing Mistress bottomless while still wearing something on top has always been one of my favorites visions of her.  She has such a sexy and hips area and when being bottomless, it is perfectly accentuated.  But I digress ............

Mistress leaned over the bed and ordered me to put my cock inside her.  In instants like this, when something so sexy is unexpected, I can sometimes last for a good long time.  This wasn't one of those times and it wasn't even a minute or so before I had to pull out and fight real hard not to cum, or ejaculate.  As much as Mistress is aware that the orgasm denial lifestyle and frequent edgings that I am subject to do a good job of keeping me in a constant state of arousal, she also knows that it plays hell on my ability to last long enough sometimes for her to get the kind of pleasure she wants in spontaneous moments like this.  She didn't express too much disappointment, but I could tell that she had some.  At least a little.  I offered to put pinky (cock extension) on and give her a good, hard fucking but she felt we were running out of "safe alone time".  She stood up from the bed, turned to face me, kissed me tenderly and told me I was not allowed to clean her juices from my cock. She also said, "we are going to have to work on you lasting longer".  I reminded that not too long ago we were doing cock therapy for this very reason.  You can see some of the posts regarding cock therapy by clicking on "cock therapy" under the Labels section on the right side and at the bottom of the page here.  Basically though, cock therapy was an exercise she would put me through by declaring a certain number of thrusts inside I was expected to complete without stopping and without having to pull out.  Any number less than the prescribed number meant that was how many hard paddle swats I was to receive immediately.  Say the number she gave was 100 and I go only go (nonstop) to 30.  I'd get 70 spanks right then!

She smiled, kissed me again and said, "yeah, maybe we'll start that again and went to the bathroom.  when she returned, she was instantly reminded that I was still scheduled for a 48 (a spanking she declared was due within 48 hours because of an infraction).  Actually, I was due for 2 of them.  Still naked, I was ordered to the close and told to wait.  A few seconds later she entered, fully clothed and  started spanking my bottom with her bare hand.  She's a strong girl and packs a wallop, even with her hand, but Mistress prefers an implement and asked if I had packed her paddle.  After saying no, because she hadn't told me to, she spotted the belt still in my shorts in a clump on the floor.  She immediately pulled the belt from the shorts and proceeded to redden my ass with the belt.  I always my best to remain still because i want Mistress to see me being brave for her paddlings but sometimes the paddle (in this case the belt) stings like a mother and I'll instinctively move away.  After being ordered back into position, Mistress resumed then completed my spanking and had me kneeling on the floor, red assed and naked, for some after care.  She pulled my face into her belly and lifted her shirt so that I could kiss and nuzzle in her belly.  She knows that it is my happy place to be after a spanking.  I apologized for my behavior and thank her for giving me my spanking.  Just I was about to ask Mistress if I could ask her for something special in the punishment department,  everyone starting returning to the house, which require that discussion to happen at a later time. 

What I wanted to ask her was .... while we are in the mountains and when we are with so many others, which is most of the time, when Mistress declares that's a spanking was necessary, could we take a drive into the forest and have my punishment be executed there? 

More to come bur for now, real life needs my attention. 

It's time to be spanked again

I was out of town on a business trip last week for 3 days.  Unlike earlier in our marriage, being apart from Mistress K. is a rare appearance these days.  I just don't travel for business much anymore, which is a good thing.

I was in Miami and one day I went deep sea fishing.  On this particular day things were hectic and I just simply failed to communicate with Mistress K.    I texted her in the morning and let her know that I was about to go fishing and she responded by telling me that she thought it was awesome that I had a chance to go.  Long story short, several hours later she received a picture of fishing activities and then for the next 6 hours, she received nothing.  We had a banquet to attend at the conference I was at and on the way back to the hotel, traffic and other issues caused for us to return late.  I had to rush to shower, shave and put my suit and then hurry down to the banquet and schmooze with the other attendees.  Standing in the shower, I was thinking to myself .... I am beat and wish I didn't have to go to this dinner.  My phone battery was dead, so I left it on the charger and heading down to the ballroom.  Knowing I didn't go to Miami to sleep, I "pressed flesh and kiss babies" like I was running for Mayor or something.  When it was over (I actually left earlier than most and avoided the inevitable "let's go to the bar and get hammered" group that was forming.  I got back to my room, flopped onto the bed and fell asleep in my clothes.  I was beat!

I was awakened by the beeping of the phone which turn out to be a number of texts from Mistress K.  At this point she was not happy that I had not checked in to tell her that I hadn't fallen into the ocean or some other miserable fate.  Shortly after I woke, the phone rang and Mistress K. read me the riot act for allowing her to worry like that.  She said that my not checking in with her after my return to the shore, and before going to the banquet was not acceptable, that she was not happy and in the stupor of deep slumber I heard her say emphatically .....  "48 hours from the moment you get home". Then she hung up the phone after telling me that she was glad I wasn't dead.  Of course that means that I am to receive a punishment spanking within those 48 hours and that it is my responsibility to allow time and a space for that to happen within those 48 hours no matter what!  Failure to do so will elevate the punishment to whole different level .... the kind of level that neither of us wants to have happen!  This 48 hour period expires tonight (Sunday night) at 11pm, so I am certain that I will be sent to bed with a sore and red bottom.

That's not all.  The day after I returned from my trip, I asked Mistress a question about her job that was snarky and wise-assey.  Immediately before leaving for my trip, Mistress had scolded me about my being snarky sometimes when I communicate with her, or in the way I ask her questions.  "Another 48 hours" was her reply to my snarky question.  That 48 hour period expires at 10pm on Monday evening.  It looks like Monday evening will be busy because recently Mistress introduced a new ritual that will be a part of our life into the future, until future notice.  From now on, the second Monday of every month will be "milking day".  On milking day, I am required to remind Mistress on that morning that it is milking day.  I am to remind her again in the afternoon and that I am to see to it that it happens on that, which means clearing any obstacles (family or otherwise) that may conflict with our new ritual.  It's going to be a busy Monday for sure.

Forgive me for being "off the grid" the past several days.  I have so much reading and catching up to with all my blogging friends and others.  It's good to be home!

A stolen moment

It was Saturday (yesterday).  One of our kids had a friend over and the house was filled with the joy of children at play.  We had a kid's sports related event to go to at 5pm, followed by a gathering of the team at one of the parents house.  At around 3:30, the kids ended up going over to the friend's house before going to the event.  Mistress put them in the car and ran them over.

Then, at 3:50, this text string began ... MK: "Lover, get naked.  I will be home in a few minutes.  I want a glass of ice water waiting",  SHIP:  yes Mistress   MK:  Are you empty?  SHIP:  Not really   MK:  Can you be in the next 5 minutes?   SHIP:  Yes   MK:  Do it.

Mistress arrived.  I was naked and empty.  I just love being told to be naked in order to greet her when she comes home.  She came into the house, put her purse down and started kissing me passionately, rubbing her hands all over my exposed body.  She confirmed that I was "empty" and then pointed to the bedroom and said "in there ... go".  Once inside, she removed her pants and matter-of-factly instructed me to get the thigh harness and whatever I wanted to put into that would end up in my bottom.  

She told me to hurry because we didn't have much time.  While is was in the closet getting the harness and the dildo that would fuck me, Mistress retrieved her wand vibrator.

When I returned, she was sitting in Queen chair, vibrator in hand and instructed me to kneel between her legs and install the harness on her left thigh.  She promptly scooted toward the edge of the chair.  I put a condom on the rubber cock and slid it into place in the harness, and then secured the Velcro harness to her thigh.  She spread her legs wide, turned on the vibrator and placed it on her panty covered clit.  She pointed to the cock sticking up from her leg and said "come on, get over it and lower yourself on to it".  I straddled the rubber cock, smeared lube all over my bottom hole and it, positioned it at it's intended target and lowered myself on it.  Mistress was rapidly approaching the first of two orgasms she would have as I slowly lowered myself onto her cock.  After just a few seconds to allow myself to comfortable accept the intruder, she ordered me to fuck myself on her cock.  I moved my and down while watching her have an incredible orgasm.  The sight before me and the realization that this actually happening to me had brought me to the very edge of orgasm.  It was so hot.  I felt so very objectified and as you know, just witnessing Mistress having an orgasm can almost produce an orgasm for me and with my ass filled, facing her and witnessing an especially fast and strong orgasm, I was right there.

After her orgasm subsided, Mistress ordered me to place some lube in her hand.  I was almost whimpering at the prospect of her slippery hand on my cock while all this was going.  I was certain that her hand would take past the point of no return in seconds.  Seconds later, while she was stroking me, telling me to fuck her cock and warning me not to come .... I begged her to let go because I was a second away from not being able to control it.  She did let go and just then, clear pre-bum oozed from the tip of my cock and onto her thigh.  Her eyes got huge, thinking I had disobeyed her allowed an ejaculation without permission.  I took every ounce of strength I had to prevent that from actually happening, but in the end it was only clear pre-cum. 

My thighs were killing me but I was still bobbing up and down on her thigh, fucking myself when she put the vibrator back on her panty covered pussy.  I asked her if I could turn, facing away from her while fucking myself on her leg and she said yes.  I came off of the rubber cock, turn facing away from, held the cock at my bottom and lowered myself back on it.  In this position, Mistress got a front row view of the cock going in and out of my ass and in seconds was having a second massive orgasm.  After recovering from her orgasm, she told me to stop, get off of her cock and clean everything up and put everything away.   Ughhhh!   I was just getting started but the clock is also an un-yielding Mistress.   I cleaned everything, put everything away and hastily left to the kids sports event.  I was wanting so much more so very badly, but also wallowing in the appreciation of the treat Mistress just gave me.  Later, after the sports event, I returned to the house to pick Mistress up for the after event.  She was naked and had just completed showering and putting on her makeup and was about to get dressed, but before doing so, came right up to me and said ... "you may worship me for a few seconds before we go" while pushing me to my knees.  She had just put a fresh shave on her pussy and it was as smooth and as beautiful as I have ever seen, felt or tasted.  After about 30 seconds, she pulled away and told me to get ready for the party. 

Thank you Mistress!

Masturbate for me!

This morning I was working away on the computer.  It was early and only Mistress and I were awake in the house, and she was in the shower.  I heard the shower turn and just then I was summoned.  "Lover ... ? come here please!"  I marched into the bathroom and she was just emerging from the shower.  She was naked (yay) and wet and while she was beginning to dry herself, she said "take off your pants and masturbate for me".  I removed my shorts, reached for the bottle of lube and started to walk toward her. 

She pointed to the big Jacuzzi tub we have and said "there.  Sit there on the edge of the tub and masturbate for me while I dry myself.  I want to watch you".  I began my task but since I was only 20 seconds or so into it, my cock was getting hard, but wasn't fully hard.  She said "I want to see it hard!"  "Yes Mistress".  Those words were all it took and I was hard as a diamond in another 15 seconds.  It didn't take long for me to arrive at the edge, and it coincided with her finishing drying her hair.  She merely said .... "you may go now" and pointed to the bathroom door.  It's the little things!

It's the little things.  Last evening I was standing at my sink in my bathroom after just changing out of my fancy work clothes'.  I was wearing loose shorts and a t shirt when she walked up behind me, and while pointing at the counter in from of me, said "hands".  She pulled my shorts down just past my ass and began spanking me with her hand.  There were no words and although this wasn't a punishment spanking, it was still firmer than before Mistress decided to amp up the paddling.  She spanked my bare bottom with her hand about 12-13 times and promptly pulled my shorts back up and walked over to her sink on her side of the bathroom, which is about 20 feet away.  On my way out of the bathroom, I walked over to her and stood for a second while she exposed her neck, indicating that is where i should kiss her.  I did just that and then said "Thank you for my spanking Mistress", then left the room.

It's the little things.

Milked .......

It was Monday, just like Mistress said it would be.  As I said in my previous post, I had no idea of anything other than Mistress intended to drain me of my semen.  The 9pm hour was approaching and the kids were finally in bed.  Mistress had mentioned earlier in the week that she wanted to trim my body hair.  She sent me to the bathroom and told me to prepare the clippers and myself for some grooming.  Standing naked in the shower, Mistress arrived and began the chore of grooming me.  She trimmed my body hair very, very close ... like using electric clippers without any guard close.  Afterward, I looked at myself I the mirror and I have to admit, I like what I saw.  I've never been one to want to be feminized but with that being said, it did make me feel a bit like a slut, which you may already know, I do enjoy.  Especially now ... on the cusp of being milked by my Mistress ....

(side bar  -  In the middle of writing this post, I received a call from Mistress with instructions to go to her throne in our bedroom, sit there, masturbate for one minute (and DO NOT COME of course), video it and send it to her.   Mission accomplished.

Back tour story.  Mistress instructed me to shower to remove any loose hair.  In the shower I put a fresh shave on the area of my body that is owned by her.  I mean after all, if she was going to be paying close attention to that part of my body, it should at least e freshly groomed as well. When I emerged from the bathroom, Mistress instructed me to get a towel.  She laid it our on the floor at the foot of our bed, then disappeared into our closet telling me lie face up on the towel.  The Aneros milking tool was lying nearby. 

When she returned, she placed a blindfold on me and thus began the process of my milking.

It became clear early on that Mistress intended for this to be a romantic event and proceeded to subject my naked body to all sorts of sensation.  There was tickling, biting, scratching, tender kisses, soft tongue gentle hands and over my body.  Mistress even honored me by taking my cock into her Goddess mouth and pleasure me for several minutes that way.  I always consider it an incredible honor when Mistress will place her mouth anywhere on my body, and especially so when she takes my cock in her mouth.  Yummy. 

Mistress then straightened my left leg fully and secured my left ankle to the bed.  Then, she bound my wrists together and stretched them fully and secured them as well, leaving me fully stretched.  My right leg was left unsecured.  I was to discover shortly that she left it unsecured on purpose in order to be able to raise that leg and paddle my bottom from time to time, which she did several times.  On one occasion, she raised my leg and was paddling me and struck my balls.  It hurt!  She didn't seem to mind and continued with her procedure.  She also produced our flogger and proceeded to flog my exposed, vulnerable body all over, included my now aching balls.  Mistress hadn't shown much interest in the past for CBT but on this occasion seemed to enjoy the moans of pain that were coming from my mouth (which was gagged by this time with out ball gag).  After 30 minutes or so of delicious torture over my body, Mistress liberally applied lube to my ass and gently slide a finger inside.  It was time to get to the task at hand ... the draining of my balls of it's contents.

After a minute or so of her finger, I could feel the hardness of the Aneros at my rear hole.  Mistress slide it quickly but gently and soon my prostate was feeling the full effect of the intruder.  Mistress "primed the pump" by stroking my cock and in no time I was so very close to the edge I felt certain I wasn't going to be able to prevent an ejaculation.  I knew that if I had ejaculated now, without her permission to do so, I'd be subject to a very harsh spanking punishment like the one I received a week or so ago for the very same offense.  It took every ounce of strength I had to prevent an ejaculation.  There was an emission but it only precum.  I was so deep in subspace and lost in the sensations that were happening to me.  Mistress was working the Aneros on my prostate and in no time, the semen just ran from body and was pooling all over my tummy.  There was no controlling it.  It was a completely involuntary expulsion of semen, and there was a ton of it.  There was no orgasm.  None. There wasn't even the kind of slight pleasure that comes from a ruined orgasm.  it was merely the sensation of the fluid leaving my body.  Mistress removed the device from my wanton ass leaving me wanting more.  I just laid there, covered in my own cum while Mistress removed the restraints.  When my limbs were free, Mistress laid with not saying a word.  We just laid there holding each other.  A few minutes later, Mistress instructed me to clean everything up so we could go to bed.

Isn't she the greatest Mistress ever?  Mission accomplished!

The following morning, I was instructed to wear my glass again that day.  I felt the soreness inside my hole all day but it was the kind of soreness that felt wonderful. 

On this morning I asked Mistress permission to ask her to consider something (that's a new rule for us).  She said yes, so I asked her that since she was on her monthly visitor, and since it was the only time of the month that she even consider using her strapon on me, I asked her if she would consider donning her thigh harness that holds her rubber cock, and allow me to ride it while she sat in her throne.

She said she would consider it.  I'm so excite that she is considering it.  I love performing for her this way ..... I hope she says yes!

I'll ask again, isn't she the greatest Mistress Wife ever?

You will be milked tonight

Last night when we got into bed, we were both just so tired.  Even so, before Mistress's head could hit the pillow, I asked Mistress .. "would you like an orgasm this evening?", as I do almost every night.  She said "thank you pet, but not tonight.  I am just so tired."  I replied, "yes Mistress" and pressed my naked body against hers so we could fall asleep. 

A minute or so later, Mistress said "tomorrow night, after the kids are in bed, you are going to be milked!".  I replied with a simple but eager "Yes Mistress", and pulled her into me tighter and pressed my hardening cock into her.  Moments later she was asleep and then so was I.  Before I feel asleep, I wondered what exactly that meant.  Would she want to merely, as a matter of clinical-like maintenance, drain my balls of the months worth of cum that has built up in there. 

 

After all, I have denied orgasms for a longer period of time than ever before.  Was it going to be her intention to milk me through prostate massage?  Was she going to turn me into her little ass slut and fuck my ass with her strapon until I emptied all my cum?  Not knowing was killing me, but whatever it was to be, I am so excited for it.

This morning 5:52 am, I prepared her coffee in anticipation of my morning ritual of worshipping her tummy to wake her.  This particular morning, at 5:55 am precisely, I removed all my clothes and climbed onto the bed to wake her with my worship.  It has become my most favorite part of every work day.  I just love those few moments every morning where I can wallow in subspace and worship at the altar of the most beautiful woman in the world.  But I digress ............

There was no mention of the milking this morning and for fear of seeming to eager and pestering her, I didn't bring it up.  Mistress was on the way to her office when she called to inform me that in advance of tonight's milking "you will masturbate to the edge 4 separate times in the shower.  Then you will wear your plug today so you will be ready for your milking tonight".  Then there will be further instructions for you to follow this evening after work".  Oh boy ...............

Truth be told, whatever method intends to accomplish the emptying of my balls, I will not be distracted from her intended goal, which is of course.  Given a preference, I am hopeful that Mistress intends to accomplish this without allowing me to have a full orgasm.  It has been almost 3 months since my last full orgasm and I am actually more and more proud of each day that passes without needing or wanting one, while I am still in a constant state of desire for my beautiful Mistress.

Wish me luck!

Ejaculating without permission

It happened.  It has never happened before but it happened.  About a week ago, Mistress wanted me inside her while she was using her vibrator to have an orgasm.  On this occasion, she had specifically told me that I would not be having an orgasm, ruined or otherwise.  It is my job of course to pull out if I get too close to the edge but on this occasion, I pulled out too late.  I didn't have an orgasm (not even a ruined one for that matter) but my body just took over and a small ejaculation happened.  All over her tummy.  My initial hope was that it was just a build up of pre cum, bit alas, it was the real thing.

This marks the first time that I have ejaculated without permission.  Not only did I not have permission, but was specifically told NOT TO!

My friend little girl talked about the nervous anticipation that goes along with knowing that a punishment spanking is pending, and not knowing when or to what extend.  You can read her words here: 

http://submissivelittlegirl.blogspot.com/2015/04/crawling-back-to-you.html?showComment=1427987278030#c5562281381450916194

Nervously, I attempt to "prepare myself mentally" for what is coming, but it only seems to manifest itself in shame and regret for having displeased Mistress the way I did.

I'll keep you posted.

Ruined Orgasms (again)

OK, here is my first attempt at posting a naughty picture since the Google Warlords gave us all that scare a couple of weeks ago .............

Still here and there are no black helicopters landing in my yard, so I guess I can go on. 

There are some guys out there that can have full on orgasms one after the other.  They can do it on cue, after having been stimulated for a long time.  These guys are called porn stars!  *smile

There are others, like me, that react to ruined orgasms in a very profound and positive way.  I have actually come to prefer ruined orgasms over full on orgasms for one reason and one reason only.  When done correctly, they actually do allow my sexual desire for my beloved Mistress to go uninterrupted.  Also, it allows Mistress a viable way to give a sexual reward when Mistress believes my behavior has warrant a sexual reward.  I have come to so look forward to the singular feeling of having my ejaculate just pump or drain out of my body after having been edged. Love it.  I'm convinced that the source of this pleasure comes from the knowledge that after having a ruined orgasm, I am actually able to have several more (ruined) orgasms immediately following the first, and still honestly have little (if any) drop in my desire for my beautiful Mistress Wife.  Conversely, when I know I am going to have a full on orgasm, there is a very real thought in my mind that regrets knowing that there will be a period of time that follows that I have a natural loss of  sexual desire for my wife, and I know that in that state, I cannot be the best loving, submissive husband I can be. 

Admittedly, there are times when Mistress wants to give me only a ruined orgasm and fails to stop the stimulation soon enough, causing what amounts to somewhat of an actual orgasm.  When this happens, there is a drop in my desire that confounds and disappoints both of us, but I attribute that to the orgasm not being all the way ruined. 

I'm convinced that every successful FLM/FLR's all have one thing in common.  The submissive male actually, genuinely and truly exists in that relationship for one reason .... to serve and be a primary source of pleasure for his beloved wife, and to get his only source of sexual pleasure from her, in a manner in which she deems fit.  OK, that's two things in common. 

To an outsider looking in, it wouldn't seem logical or even possible for what I am saying here to be true.  I mean really ... what man in there right mind would actually feel that a ruined orgasm is preferred over a full on orgasm?  A submissive husband that lives in a loving Female Led Marriage, that's who.  Looking back on the goals that I hoped to achieve when I first started thinking about FLM, and thinking about current and recurring goals of using the actual desire (sexual and otherwise) I have for my beautiful Mistress K., the fact that ruined orgasms prevent a decline in that desire is enough for me to prefer them over full orgasms. 

There is one thing I for which I am certain ... Since entering in our FLM, I have had "eleventy-billion" times fewer orgasms than I have had at given time in my life  ... and my sex life has never been better.  For me, my life is a sex life because of the constant state of desire for this one woman that owns my sex.  What a wonderful place to be.

We never really fight

But last night we had a tiff.  Mistress was explaining what had just happened with one of our kids and I was rolling my hand as if to encourage her to get to the point.  That's when the trouble started. It was an incredibly rude thing to do and she let me know she wasn't at all happy with me by immediately sopping the conversation, leering at me and then going silent.  For about 15 minutes following, I brooded thinking she shouldn't be so upset over something so small. 

We went about our business getting dinner ready which required some interaction.  It was clear that she remained unhappy with me.  I thought about the many wise words from my dear friend I'm Hers (  http://im-hers.blogspot.com/  ) and quickly realized that my actions were both unnecessary and disrespectful.  I sincerely apologized to Mistress K and she quickly accepted my apology.  I immediately felt that I may have avoided one of those "severe punishment spankings".  The kind where Mistress K. forces me to masturbate to orgasm proceeding a hard spanking.  Quickly things got back to "normal" and we were having a nice, wonderful evening enjoying each other's company.

I went to bed before Mistress K. and fell asleep quickly.  I had showered before going to bed and thought I'd surprise her by having her sub laying naked in bed, wearing a hint of her favorite cologne that she loves so much.  When she came to bed she nuzzled beside me and started rubbing my butt, running her fingers lightly over and barely between my ass cheeks.  She knows how much I love that.  She whispered to me that I had angered her earlier and that this was now that second offense for which I had a spanking pending, while she continued to rub my bottom.  She abruptly removed the sheets, exposing my bare ass and gently placed a kiss on my ass.  I was both horny and worried about what was to come next.  She stopped rubbing me and then rolled over and settled in for the night.  She said goodnight, placed a hand on my ass and drifted off to sleep.  I tried to entice some more of her tender attention to my bottom but she was not interested.  We both fell asleep.

This morning was like any other morning.  Mistress retrieved the coffee I had made for and set about getting ready for her day.  After her shower, while she was about to blow dry her hair, she called me into the bathroom, had me lock the door, told me to get some lube and instructed me to sit on the floor and masturbate while she dried her hair.  She was naked expect for the Uggs boots she likes to wear in the morning.  I began to masturbate while watching her dry her hair.  She was a vision of gorgeousness occasionally leaning over to offer me a view of hat ass I love to worship so much.  She stopped and said "you will not be cumming"!  When I told her I was going to cum if I didn't stop stroking, she said "you'd better figure it out".  OMG it was torture.  I was successful in continuing without cumming but it was the most intense edging I have had in some time.  When she was done drying her hair, she said "you may stop now.  Get cleaned up and return to what you were doing."  I'm not certain, but I'm pretty sure that was a form of punishment because Mistress wouldn't let me stop, and she wouldn't let me cum, and she wouldn't let me touch her.

As I write this, my blue balls ache while my mind considers my pending punishment(s).  I am so sorry Mistress.

I think I'll make you orgasm

Last night, I was laying naked in bed, waiting for Mistress to join me.  In the winter (even though it's sunny warm Phoenix) Mistress wear sock, pajama pants and a t-shirt to bed.  Guh. For obvious reason, I so much prefer when Mistress sleeps naked.   Anyway ... as she was going through her routine of getting all 3 of her pillows adjust in just perfect position, and making sure the blanket was the perfect length to be able to fully cover her as she settles in to her comfy bed (this process can take as much 3 or minutes, even longer if she forgets something 3/4 of the way through, has to get out of bed and return to start the process all over), Mistress asked me ... "when was the last time you had an orgasm?"  I replied, "do you mean a ruined orgasm, or a real one?".  "A real one", she said.

"October 15, 2014 Mistress", was my reply.  The was a bit of pride in my reply..  After all, that was 3 1/2 months since my last full on orgasm and since then, I have had some of the most incredible sex of my entire life, have never been more genuinely in love with my beautiful Wife and have never desired her sexually.  She was rolling into her final resting spot for the evening on and in her mountain of pillows when she said "Hmmm, I think I'll make you have an orgasm".  There was reason given, no time table, no indication that it was going to be that night ..... just the lingering threat of a forced orgasm. 

Interestingly (at least to me), I began to think about the forced orgasm coming my way in much the same way I feel when Mistress has declared that I will be receiving a punishment spanking.  That regret and fear of something that you know will happen.  Something that is an enigma in that the idea of having to endure a harsh, punishment spanking (or something else that Mistress may require) is arousing, but the actual act while it is happening .... isn't.  Why in the world would equate the idea of my beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, loving, nurturing Mistress making me have an orgasm, to the searing sting, pain and shame that comes with a punishment spanking.  Not one of those sexy, foreplay kind of spankings .... I mean one of those "you really fucked boy and your ass is going to pay for it" kind of spankings.

Mine is not to question when, why and how Mistress will declare a punishment spanking is necessary, or anything else for that matter.  If Mistress wants me to have an orgasm, that's what will happen, even if I don't want to have one.  Do you think it's possible for someone outside the lifestyle, someone vanilla, to even be able to understand how it could be possible that I am happier than I ever have been in my marriage, and in my sex life, with the knowledge that my last full orgasm was over 3 1/2 months ago, and only because the was the last time my wife allow me to have one?  I love my life.  I love my wife!

Objectification. It's the little things

I was in the shower this morning getting ready to go to work.  Mistress returned from taking the kids to school and stood in the entry to the shower to tell me a story she had just heard on the radio about a cat that was thought to be dead, was buried, then clawed it's way out of the grave and is alive.  It was an interesting story.

While I was washing myself and rinsing my hair under the warm water, she was looking at me in a way that made me feel she really enjoyed what she was seeing.  When we were through talking about the cat story, she reached for a small wash cloth and placed it on the floor of the shower.  She told me put some soap in my hand and then told me to kneel on the small cloth.  I was instructed to masturbate for her.  I was not erect when I was given these instructions but started to masturbate anyway.  She likes to have me masturbate for her, I think partly because she just likes to watch and partly because she likes to allow me to because I no longer am able to masturbate like i did before we entered this glorious life that we lead. 

She said "I don't want to watch you stroke a limp cock.  Get it hard for me."  Even though i was limp, I was at the edge of orgasm.  She didn't care, and repeated her instruction to get it hard.  It was very much like what is expected in a "Devotional Sex" relationship where the man (knight) is expected to reveal his penis and then become erect when the woman (Princess) utters the word "present".  My erection was on it's way, albeit slower than either of us wanted.  The moment she raised an eyebrow as if to project that failure to become erect immediately would result in disappointment, I became hard as a rock!  This pleased Mistress to no end and as such, she lifted the pajama top she was wearing to reveal her breasts and torso and moved toward where I was kneeling, and offered them to me to worship.  I so much love to worship Mistress' breasts and tummy, and especially that part between her belly button and her, um, promised land.  After only a few minutes, she told me to stop, finish my shower and then get ready for work.  She told me (for the 3rd day in a row) to just dress normal under my clothes today.  Since starting our FLM, there has never been a 3rd day in a row that Mistress has instructed me not to wear something.  It's rarely ever 2 days in a row for that matter. 

Did I feel objectified by Mistress during this impromptu little scene?  Yes I did.  Did I enjoy being objectified by Mistress?  YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I DID!  There is hardly anything I enjoy more than performing sexually for Mistress' viewing pleasure.  I just love it when she tells me to do it, whether it is masturbating while she watches or showing her how I fuck my self with the dildo she has for me.  When it is not something planned like this morning, it is especially rewarding.

Thank you Mistress!

Orgasms ... and the lack thereof

I will start this post off by saying two things ....  1.  I haven't had a full orgasm since October of last year, with only 3 ruined orgasms since;  and  2.  I am not at all complaining about that fact.

In fact, after our latest incredibly sexy session

(link to it here:  http://subhubphx.blogspot.com/2015/01/i-was-good-boy.html)

while I was telling Mistress K. thank you and that we had been to a couple places together that we hadn't been to before, I made the comment that although my orgasms are now few and far between during the past 18 months or so, the sex I have been lucky enough to be allowed to have has been beyond incredible.  I've been thinking about this ever since we discussed it.  Thinking about how unlikely it is that I would ever be able to explain to someone outside the realm of understanding the basic dynamics of a FLM, what an incredible and sexually satisfying ride it has been.  They'd never believe it .... because they wouldn't be able to.  My beautiful, skilled Mistress Wife seems to know exactly when her devoted, submissive husband should be allowed (or required) to orgasm, be it ruined or full.  In fact, Mistress K. was so in tuned to having conditioned me to restricted orgasm that when we were in the hottest part of our recent incredible sex, Mistress warned me that she was going to ruin me that day.  there was no asking, no negotiating, just a statement of fact from my Mistress of how my sex was going to conclude.

 

Have I mentioned before that I love ruined orgasms?  yeah, I'm pretty sure I have.

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I guess to illustrate my feelings about this, here I am writing a post about how my orgasms are so few and far between .... and .... I'm hard as a rock.  Makes me really want to ................

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Or ........

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It's a little more incredible and less satisfying of a ruined orgasm when Mistress takes me there with ZERO direct stimulation to my penis.  I wonder what it's like to entirely own the sex of someone that you love and lust for so deeply.  I'm hoping it's as incredible as having someone that you love and lust for deeply, owning it completely.

I love you Mistress.

Yep, it's that time again

Being Thankful ......................

there are so many obvious things in each of our lives to be thankful for.  Our families, our friends and everyone that we love and that loves us.

That being said, I think it is important to say who and what we are thankful for.

• I am thankful for my beautiful family.  I have the most amazing kids, the most amazing wife and live a life that I only dreamed of when I was a young man, and was wondering how my life would be when i was the age that I am. 
• I am thankful for being a completely loved husband in a loving Female dominated marriage with Mistress K., and all of the joy that comes with it.
• I am thankful for having been officially collared by my wife, the beautiful Mistress K. just one short month ago.
• I am thankful that Mistress K. owns my orgasms and owns all my sexual activities.
• I am thankful that Mistress K. is not the kind of Mistress that restricts visual and physical access to her beautiful body.
• I am thankful that Mistress K. loves me enough to correct me with punishments each time she believes it is necessary to do so.
• I am thankful for being kept in constant, voluntary chastity.
• I thankful for the ability to be able to express myself in this blog, and for the it's ability to be able to create new friends along the way.  Even though as a group, we are (kind of) "weird", we are a very loyal, lovable and intelligent group and I adore my time spent with each one of you
• I am thankful that each day Mistress decides what I will wear or in my body that will be a constant reminder of my dedication of servitude to her that day.
• I am thankful that today Mistress K. has instructed me to wear both my glass butt plug and my favorite pair of red, lacy thong panties.

I am so looking forward to the future as Mistress K. and I continue to discover the depths of our love and dedication to each other.  I am excited to continue to learn and to continue to have my/our limits tested and expanded.

Happy Thanksgiving to each of you, my beloved friends, followers and lurkers!

Post Script edit .... I've reached a milestone of sorts.  this is my 200th post.  yay!

Pictures of Mistress

One I've shared this particular one with you before .......... from this past summer:

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And this one, which was from the night we had our vows renewal and collaring ceremony.  In this picture, Mistress was giving me one of my gifts right before I was allowed the honor of worshipping her. 

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Isn't she gorgeous???

Edging

I awoke this morning at 4:48 am because the dog was restless.  Frustrated, I decided I would rise for the day and when I did, I woke Mistress from her slumber.  She asked me if I was up for the day or if i intended to go to the couch and try to fall back to sleep.  When I told her I was up for the day, wihtout hesitating and mere seconds after behind awakened, she told to go put on some pink lace panties and that beginning at 5am, I was to go into the bathroom every 15 minutes, lower those panties and edge myself, until 16 am.  It is 5:53 as I write this and I can tell you that my cock is so eager to cum that it almosr goes of when the light shines it. 

I love how my Mistress uses me.

Perfect Morning

What with Mistress' friend just leaving town and a very busy weekend schedule wise, we are finally getting back to a normal schedule.  This morning Mistress suggested that I go in to the office late in order for us to spend some "quality time" together.  That always makes me smile.

Mistress took the kids to school and while she was gone, I showered and got a fresh shave (only my cock, balls and ass - I'm doing the No Shave November thing) and awaited her return.  She returned and immediately walked past me and into the bedroom as I was working (naked of course) on the computer, which is right next to the entrance.  She left the door opened and in a minute or so, I heard "we can start by cuddling.  Come here"  I smiled and immediately rose and dutifully walked into the bedroom to find her laying on the bed, under the covers, I pull the covers back to and climbed in behind her to spoon her.  She was wearing her t-shirt and light sweater still but i was thrilled to see that she was only wearing panties below the waist.  I climbed in and snuggled with her and we just laid there for several minutes.  Then she pushed the covers down and told me "you will rub my legs now.  They are sore".  For 20 minutes or so, i tenderly rubbed her sore legs while she moaned in delight.  I kept trying to remove her panties but she was having none of that!  Then she started to get a little horny so she pulled her shirt up and told me to start kissing her "favorite part" which I know to be her side from her breasts to her bottom.  It was heaven.  I was feeling that familiar urge to maybe even have a hands free orgasm by the sight of her while i worshipped her.  Then she abruptly removed her panties and ordered me to enter her.  It was all i could to keep from coming while she pulled me inside of her.  She sternly said "don't you dare even think of cumming". 

She had me rub on, bite on, kiss on her back and bottom for another 10 minutes when i made an error in judgment.  I slapped her ass.  Harder than I intended.  I will do that sometimes and she will love it.  This was not one of those times.  I must've just done it too hard and she immediately turned, ordered me across her lap and proceed to punish my left butt cheek solely with her hand.  It hurt and I was begging her to stop and telling that I was only trying to make her feel good.  She responded by saying "what, do you mean like this?" and proceeded to punish my ass some more. 

When she was done with the impromptu punishment, she then told me to get the vibrator and return to her in the very same position I was in then, which was me laying on my side, perpendicular to her with my cock buried inside her.  We looked like a large X from above I am sure.  She was particularly happy with position because she could pull me into rather easily while she was working herself to orgasm (rather quickly I might add).  i loved the position because i could view her building toward her orgasm from the side, an angle I don't get very often.  It was magic.  It is always magic to be allowed inside of Mistress to begin with but to be allowed to stay inside of her while she is having an orgasm is almost to much to bear without cumming myself.  Just beautiful.  I was starry eyed in love at that moment.

When she was done, she told me to get out of bed, put in my butt plug and get dressed to go to work.  Mistress will usually ask me what I have in store that day and if it includes meeting or gatherings that include several women, she like to know that I there with a plug in my ass.  So glass butt plug it is.

In closing, Mistress was telling me last night that she and her friend had some pretty intimate conversations about our lifestyle, and her friend's lifestyle changes that she is hoping to incorporate into her own marriage.  The weren't many details of their conversation revealed to me but suffice it to say, I can't wait to hear more.