Should Orgasms Be Earned?

I say no.  That said, I do understand the importance of celebrating each couple's "to each their own" way of living their best lives, so if you are able to earn orgasms and it makes you both happy ... God Bless you.  I applaud you.

During a recent conversation, I went on and on about the importance of our lifestyle here in Mistress K.'s, of it only ever being about her.  Her choices, her pleasures, her preferences, her bliss.  All without the burden of reciprocation or even ever having to feel guilty about indulging in whatever she wants in a particular moment.

We have a power exchange relationship where she has the power.  If I were able to expect anything, let alone an orgasm by virtue of something else, like time served, doing my chores, being a good boy, a pair of dice, or anything other than Mistress K.'s whim, then it would mean that she really didn't have the power that we previously exchanged.

I'm so glad that she said yes!

This really is such a better way to live.  I love it when she has orgasms for us.

Thankful

I'm thankful for the amazing healthcare available in this country.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone !!!

CFNM - It's a thing

Yes, it's a thing and a pretty cool thing.  One of the great things about it is that is can be anything you, well actually She, wants it to be.  Privacy of her own home like the above pictures.

Or a day at the beach with your beautiful wife.  It can be anything.  A favorite fantasy is to be among some like-minded FLR/WLM couples where the men would wait on, serve and provide entertainment for the Ladies.  It's a bucket list item.  Maybe some day

The reason for this post today is because one of my very favorite blog sites featured a story yesterday about CFNM.  The name of the blog site is Evolving Your Man and is run by a lovely woman named Emma.  Some of you are probably even familiar with.  If you aren't, or haven't been by there in a while, click here to see the marvelous article and interview Emma did with Marie from Marie CFNM.  There are links all over the page on Emma's post.  Take a look.  

Perhaps some day Mistress would need my assistance when explaining the virtues and value of living in a WLM to one of her friends.

Submissive men? Submissive man? What's the difference? Words Matter.

Often when discussing this thing we all do, or more specifically our individual versions of this thing we do, a conversation is doomed from the beginning because of an overall generalized description of things, people, groups, men, women, etc., as if one person or scenario can adequately describe all situations or people that share, on any level, the same moniker.

A lovely sentiment like the one above is a case in point.  Although I agree with the words, and it precisely describes my relationship with Mistress K., it also can be interpreted by some as describing all submissive "men".  Is the use of the "men" nefarious that way or intentional to overly generalize?  I think not.  I think it was intended to be what I described it as ... a lovely sentiment.  

Each of us are different.  As individuals and in our respective roles within our relationships.  I try to always remember that when commenting, or otherwise being involved in a conversation about people and things.  Not just in this thing we do, but in all aspects of life.  For example, ALL men that are submissive are not the same.  Me for example.  Clearly I am a submissive man but the difference from others is that my submission is solely in the context of my marriage and is an acknowledged role that I cherish with respect to Mistress K.

Does that also mean that I am submissive in nature otherwise?  I'm not.  Does it mean that I am submissive to all women just because they are a woman?  No, it doesn't.  There are just as many idiot women as there are men.  I respect (or not) all people, men or women, based on who they are, how they treat people, their honor and integrity.  In fact, in all aspects of my life other than my submission to my wife, I am what most people would define as dominant.  I love to lead and mentor people.  I love to teach others how advance their lives with honor, integrity, hard work and the other obvious characteristics that any reasonable person would agree are necessary in life.  Would I be able to live my life my way and be effective as a leader or mentor to others if they knew I get spanked or pegged by wife, or that she decides when, how and even if I have an orgasm, or that she decides solely when sex will happen and how, or perhaps even someday with whom?  I doubt it.  

Sure there are many examples of how "all men" and "all women" are and behave, and the conversations that arise out of such matters will often turn into a giant pissing contest because there are inevitably men or women that have been lumped into such a vague generalization, that the narrative doesn't apply to truthfully.  Sometimes those people take exception, even get offended at being thought of, or even defined in such a general fashion.  The same thing happens in politics.  Clearly there are those that will defend to the death that one party is evil and the other party is the opposite of evil.  So much so in fact that when a dipshit politician fucks up, the thing about them that matters the most is whether there is a (D) or a (R) associated with their name.  Foes of whatever party is involved will use that dipshit politician as "proof" that all other (D)'s or (R) share the same characteristics.  It's ridiculous, and worse, it's harmful.  Do the respective party leaders know this?  Of course they.  The know it very well and use it to their advantage.

Every person does what they do and with who they do it with for reasons that are exclusive to them.  Assuming each of them seeks happiness and joy in their lives, and assuming they have no intention of imposing their shit on other people, I will wholeheartedly support them in the "works for them" situation.

Words matter.  Be impeccable with your words, both when uttering them and hearing others say them.  Thanks for listening.  I'd love to know your thoughts.

Lake Tahoe is Gorgeous

 We have returned from our Anniversary trip to Lake Tahoe, and it was spectacular.  I've been to Reno of several occasions (Meh!) but had never been to South Lake Tahoe.  It's amazingly beautiful to say the least.  We stayed at the Edgewood Tahoe Resort and it too was stunning.  Holy shit is that place nice.

I won't boor you with pictures or descriptions of the scenery.  Really, who the hell wants to see other people's vacation pictures?  Trust me when I tell you, the nature was awesome.  Ok, here's one picture of the anniversary gift I gave Mistress K. I took while sitting in the airport on our way there.

As mentioned in previous blogs, our relationship journey has sped up quite nicely over the past few months for a variety of reasons.  Those reasons are mainly because of my nearly non-stop wearing of my chastity cage, and because we have been empty nesters since the beginning of the school year in August.  

We had a a ball.  Talked about and done many things that we have never done in the past.  Role played some really sexy shit in bed, in the kitchen, all over really.  We'd talked about sexual things that we never dreamed we would talk about.  Permanent (mostly) chastity, sex toys and the like.  We brought along Mistress K.'s two new boyfriends for her sexual enjoyment.  Her new boyfriends are two new dildo cocks I bought for her a few weeks ago.  They are different in shape, texture and size so she has options when she wants to get fucked by something other than my cock.  Read about it here. 

My submission, her loving and sensual Dominance permeated every minute of our time away together.  There was a ton of sex.  Two of those sexy were especially notable.  During one of those, Mistress was laying in bed watching college football and just had a hankering to give a spankering and had me fetch her paddle and lay across her lap in bed while she proceeded to redden my ass nicely.  Not super painful, but mostly stingy and playful, but it lasted quite a bit.  She then had me retrieve the bondage tape she decided to bring along and bound my ankles together, bound my wrists together above my head, gagged me with a rag and left me there on the bed then disappeared into the other room.  She returned wearing the sexiest micro mini dress.  I guess you can call it a dress.  It's actually more of a nicely tailored and fitted net in the shape of a sexy dress.  She pulled a chair to the foot of the bed, retrieved one of her boyfriends and her wand vibrator and proceed to fuck and make to herself.

It was amazing.  After watching her new boyfriend go in and out of her for what seemed like forever, and several orgasms later, she decided to have a couple more orgasms up on the bed, right next my face while still bound and unable to move.  All I could do was watch.  When she was done, she untied me, removed my gag and she was going to get ready for dinner.  It was one the most amazingly sexy, god-I-wanted-to-cum-so bad moments of my life.  

The other notable holy-fuck sex moment was in the shower.  We had to check out by noon.  Before we started to pack she told to strip naked and get in the shower.  This room had an enormous shower.  Enormous.  I was in the maybe 5 minutes and she came in wearing her strapon.  She proceeded to wonderful and marvelous things to me.  

 So wonderful in fact that I was able to orgasm without ANY stimulation to my cock.  I had already been told that there would be no orgasms for me on this trip, at least not the kind that involved stimulating my penis.  It wasn't her plan that I would be able to achieve the elusive prostate only orgasm, but it happened.  There was nothing I could do to stop it from happening.  I was worried that I would be spanked harshly for having an orgasm after I was told I wouldn't be allowed one this weekend.  In our marriage, an orgasm without permission is pretty serious offense.

She just smiled, kissed me and said it was an amazing thing to see and that she would allow it.   Ain't she the greatest?  In the end, an anal/prostate orgasm is like a ruined orgasm in that there is no drop of desire or arousal afterward.  While we recovered in the aftermath, there was some talk about (semi) permanent chastity now that she knows I can orgasm in my cage and without stimulation.  I'm sure her new boyfriends will be more than eager to handle the penetration aspect of our sex, in the strapon harness, over my cage.

So I was still able to give her the kind of over-the-top attention she had been given all weekend.  It made for a spectacular ride home.

Thanks for stopping by.

Very Excited

We're headed out for our anniversary trip to Lake Tahoe.  I am very excited to see what Mistress K. has in mind and in store for her and us.

Sunday. What a great day it was!

As you may remember, Sunday's are special days at our house be on Sunday mornings, we connect by reading blogs and stories I have gathered during the week that interest Mistress K., and also use the time hour or so to discuss any thing that may be on each other's mind since the last time.  

On this particular Sunday, we had zero obligations, and the house and our time absolutely to ourselves.  I awoke like I always do.  When Mistress K. woke up, I fetched her coffee and delivered it to her bedside wearing my new favorite uniform.  Nothing but a tshirt and a cage.

It's a pic I shared with her a few days ago and she loved it.  

After delivering her the coffee, and after she emerged bleary-eyed from the bathroom in her robe, she explained how the day was going to go.  She explained that today she intended for me to exist in deep subspace for the entire day.  She had me stand for inspection.  She was not pleased that I was not properly shaven and went on to explain that after the breakfast I was going to prepare for her, and right after returning her kitchen to it's pristine state of cleanliness, I was to retrieve her paddle to be punished for not being smoothly shaved (again, guh).  

But first, she wanted an orgasm.  I followed her to the bed while she got in and positioned herself on the edge of the bed.  "Get Pinky". Pinky is the name she has for her wand vibrator.  "Get hard for me now."  That was easy knowing she was about to have an orgasm.  "Put your cock in me and you are only allowed to soak.  No thrusting."  In I went and she proceeded to make love to herself with Pinky.  It was glorious.

I prepared and delivered her hot breakfast to her in bed.  She loves to eat breakfast in bed.  When she was done. I retrieved her dirty dishes then it was off to clean the kitchen.  When finished with that, I returned to her bedside for my punishment.  She got out of bed and pointed to the door and told me to go to the family room and bend over the back side of the chair.  

The spanking was swift, decisive and it stung a lot.  When she was finished she said "you may rise".  I immediately did so, turn to face her then dropped to my knees to thank her for my spanking.  "You may resume what you were doing.  I'll going back to bed to watch my shows."  She loves those HGTV remodel shows.  "Remove your cage, put on panties and get your butt plug."  I asked her if I could shower before doing those things so that I could remedy the unsatisfactory condition of things down there.  "Good idea".

After emerging from the shower I went to her bedside, cage removed, so she could inspect the closeness of the shaving that did in the shower.   She was pleased.  Whew!  "Get your panties on, and get your plug."  When I returned, she was sitting in her "throne" in the corner of the bedroom and stood before her.  She pointed to the ground.  I kneeled immediately.  I was hopeful that she wanted me to orally  worship her pussy, but she had other plans.  "You will insert that plug for me while I watch.  Stand.  Turn around so I can see your ass.  Lower your panties to the ground.  Begin."  I put lube on my finger and spread it around and inserted my finger.  "Why do you put your finger in your ass?"  Because it helps loosen things a bit and makes accepting the plug easier.  She had opened her robe and was rubbing her pussy while watching.  Once it was in she said "yummy, that was hot.  I'm going to have you do that for me more often.  Pull up your panties and leave me.  Don't turn around just leave the room."

I was wearing only the panties and my plug when she re-emerged from the bedroom a short time later with the paddle in her hand.  She wanted to resume her show watching in the family room.  She laid the paddle on the couch next to her.  I thanked for having me show her up close how the plug goes in.  "You're welcome my love.  This is how you will remain dressed for the rest of the day, unless I tell you otherwise."  I left to go to the restroom but was called back right away.  "What's this", she asked, pointing at my flip flops.  They were about 4 feet away from where she thought they should be and so over the back of the chair I went again.  Another swift, stern spanking with the paddle ensued.  

The rest of the day was watching football together while she did some things around the house.  She loves football and we have a fantasy team together, so we were keeping up on that too.  At 4pm, we went to get pedicures, then off to have a drink and order some takeout food for dinner.  After returning home with the food, she asked me what time Yellowstone was on and when I told her in 1 hour and 15 minutes, she told me to leave the food in the bag on the counter and pointed to the bedroom.

During Locktober, and now into NOvember, Mistress K. (and me too) have come to enjoy me wearing the strap on over my cage, to fuck her with.  She really enjoys it for what might seem to be obvious reasons, but nonetheless ... she really enjoys it.  Until last Friday, the dildo we had was just too big for her to enjoy.  I mean eventually she'd be able to get accustomed enough to it but doing so just killed the "fuck me now" vibe.  On Friday, I went and purchased two different cocks to fuck her with that I thought she would enjoy.  It didn't escape either of us that I actually went out, on a search for cocks that weren't mine, that were going to fuck my wife.  We both nervously smiled and giggled at what that might foretell. 

We arrived in the bedroom and she instructed me to get naked and to get the "new boyfriend" that found for her ... the one with the cock AND balls, put it in the harness and come back here and fuck me.  She was naked when I returned all strapped up and ready to go.  I fucked her like a whore and she came 3 times.  When she was done, as a nice treat (good boys get treats), I was instructed to remove the harness and to soak inside of her (no thrusting) while she returned to earth.  I begged her to allow me to thrust and come and she said NO!  I then asked if I could thrust and then ruin on her tummy and she said yes.

The orgasms she had for us were amazing.  The ruined orgasm I was allowed at the end was memorable as well.  This "cucking" of me with her new strap on boyfriends is rapidly becoming a favorite of hers.