We made it

Part of the reason for the infrequent posts here over the past 2 years or so, is that we have been super, super busy as a family.  I posted some time ago about how Mistress K. was a watching 50 Shades of Grey for the first time (I still haven't seen it), and although she though the movie was ok, she did say that while watching it, she had an epiphany.  The epiphany was that she literally had the ability, even the right to dictate what kind of comfort, happiness and pleasure would exist in her life, at least to the extent that her able-bodies, devoted, loving, collared, slave husband was able to deliver.  She also realized that l she really had to do was find the comfort in making a decision based solely on her pleasure, comfort or for her benefit.  Not only that, she realized, compelling her slave husband to do the things necessary to achieve that goal, would be an enormous source of please for him (me) as well.

That was 2-3 months ago.  On the night of the epiphany, we spoke about how we would have a "working" date night, in which Mistress K. would basically explain how our life, and our lifestyle going forward.  We would also use the occasion to review and adjust our "rules" that we outlined for ourselves in the beginning of our FLM journey.  Well, that "working" dinner took place last night!

First I'll tell you that there were no "big" changes in expectations going forward, in our relationship.  Although I didn't really expect any, on a few occasions where she did mention our upcoming meeting, Mistress K. did seem to consistently use the words "how our lifestyle would be", which in and of itself didn't mean anything in particular, but .... could've meant anything. 

What the "working date night" turned out to be was one of the most wonderful nights our my/Our lives as a FLM couple.  We had a very deep and meaningful discussion about the things we have experienced thus far in our FLM lifestyle, and how much more beneficial it has been for Mistress K. to have had the experience that she had.  She feels like her feet are on more solid ground than ever when it comes to being able to take more of a lead in our marriage, and how that will continue to be a bigger and bigger source of comfort and joy in her life.  She's always know then concept of being unilaterally able to decide on things that will make her happy.  Only recently, when the epiphany occurred, did she better understand that many of things in her life that were causing stress or even unhappiness were fully within her control to decide.  All she had to do was decide, make it happen and then feel good about doing so.  She needed to be able to let go of the subconscious anticipatory concern of how I would feel about something.  That she should be able to expect that her submissive husband would find enough comfort in whatever she decided/wanted that I wouldn't be pouty.  Even more importantly, that if I did get pouty, petulant or moody, (because after all I am human and male) that all she had to do was to tell me to stop it and 1 of 2 things would happen .... 1) I'd snap out of it and fall right into line, or  2) there would be a significantly impactful punishment that would occur and THEN I would snap out of it and fall right into line.

You see, Mistress K. has always been the one to acquiesce, to pitch in to help, to fall in behind any situation in order to help, but always in a subordinate role.  However, ever since becoming a mother ... she has become increasingly aware of the positives that come from being the one to decide.  How being in control of a situation is usually the best way to be able to help someone that needs it. 

Anyway, our "working" date was very fruitful and very, very, very much appreciated by me.  Mistress K. was most certainly in charge of that meeting and was in no way interested is allowing the conversation to be a debate or a source of poutiness by either of us.  She was determined to lay out how our life together would be led in the future, after having given it much thought over the past few months.  About 30 minutes into the "discussion", I had to stop Mistress K. and tell her that even though everything we had discussed thus far had zero to do with sex, or kinkiness or anything like that, I had to tell her I had one of the hardest erections I could muster because of how incredibly attracted to her very powerful self I was.  I've referred to it in the past as a "Love Boner".

We came to some very important conclusions that night at dinner and going forward I feel incredible happy about our future.  Mistress K. acknowledges that her happiness in our marriage is completely within her control, and even though for some that is a daunting position to be in, for my beautiful Mistress Wife it will be a piece of cake.

The last job we tackled was a revision of our "Rules".  In the beginning I was told/allowed to write down some standing rules that defined a number of things and in many ways, acted like a contract.  We've a few revisions to it over the years, but on this night, we went through each and every rule and made either kept it in tact, adjusted according to Mistress K.'s preference, or deleted in entirely.  I am tasked with putting those changes in writing on the document, at which time we (Mistress K.) will re view it, in another "working" date night.  Mistress K. will either approve the final changes or make additional changes.  We will go through this process until the "Rules" are to her liking ... for know. 

I will ask Mistress K. if I can post a copy of the Rules here when completed.