Deep, loving, heavenly sub space

On Sunday morning, Mistress walked over to me on her way out the door to shuttle kids around to their various activities, and she laid the clasp that normally hangs from the drawer that houses her beautiful panties.  It looks just like this:

This clasp normally hangs from the handle of her panty drawer and is used as a non-verbal indicator of the current state of Mistress K.'s domination.  Sort of an on/off switch.  As long as it hangs there, the level of domination is FULL and COMPLETE.  On occasion in the past (pre FLM days), Mistress enjoyed all of the trappings of being the submissive in role play, so she was familiar.  Mistress agreed with me when I suggested it, that just because she was now clearly in charge and the dominant one in our marriage, it doesn't necessarily mean that she should never allow herself to temporarily dabble in the joys of  sexual submission.  If Mistress were to remove the clasp from the handle of her panty drawer, and hang it on the handle of my panty drawer, it is another non-verbal way for Mistress to let me know that she is in desire of temporarily assuming a submissive role sexually.  The idea behind our doing this has mostly to do with wanting to avoid the need for verbal discussion about what she  wants or expects from me in my temporary dominant role.  The only rules to our now temporarily-switched roles are that I am to figure out one my own how to satisfy her temporary submissive desire, without asking, and that she may very well top-from-the-bottom in order to get what she wants.    That's a little background.

It hangs there 99.9999% of the time.  In the past 18 months or so, Mistress has only hung the clasp on my drawer handle once.  Since it is something that never happened before, I just failed to notice on that particular night.  Later she admonished me for not paying enough attention to her desires to not notice.  A short time after that, she began to tease me about how I missed my chance. 

On this past Sunday morning, I was sitting in a chair watching the Masters (golf) on TV when she laid the clasp on my lap.  I asked her way she was handing it to me and not handing it on the handle of my panty drawer, and did it mean .............. you know .... that she was going to be my sub that evening?  She answered with "because last time you were a dork and didn't even notice ... and yes, THAT is what it means, even though it was laying in my lap and not hanging from my panty drawer handle.

By the time the house was quiet, the kids were in bed and the time grew near for her to become my little sex toy (*smile), Mistress had a change of heart, which of course is always her prerogative.  I couldn't hide my disappointment.  I thought she had decided to cancel the festivities for the evening but instead she announced a change of plans.  She no longer wanted to feel the joys of sexual submission.  Instead she wanted to feel the joys of my mouth worshipping her body with soft licks, tender kisses and gentle bites.  It's her favorite thing.  Frankly, it's up there among my very favorite things too.  In the spirit of what was to be, Mistress did tell me that I had no restrictions to access any part of her body, as long she felt that what I was doing felt good to her.  Usually I must ask permission to put my mouth on her pussy or bottom hole.

Yes I was still a little disappointed.  I had all kinds of things I had planned for "my sub" that evening.  Mostly that entailed two things .... Me watching her masturbate to the edge of orgasm then stopping (edging), you know, for my viewing pleasure, and;     Having her kneel in a classic sub position, knees apart, palms up, while I held onto her beautiful little head and fucked her mouth.  I also thought I'd see how far I could take a spanking with her, without crossing the line.  None of those lovely things were meant to be. 

After a short period of worship time, Mistress wanted to orgasm.  She allowed me to get her close with my tongue and as she often does, told me to fuck her so she could have her orgasm with my cock inside of her.  In preparation for what was originally planned this night, I had her favorite large dildo already condom covered and ready for action and it was resting, out of sight, right next to her favorite Hitachi-type vibrator.  When she ordered her pussy to be filled for orgasm, I pulled her to the edge of the bed, handed her the vibrator, pulled my own cock for her beautiful pussy and slowly began to insert her (larger than me) dildo.  She began the process of having one of those, long, slow deep orgasms.  Being allowed to see her have an orgasm is at the pinnacle of joy for me, and this one was especially satisfying for Mistress, and for me.  OMG ...........

After giving Mistress a moment to recover physically, I took a chance that it would be ok climb back on the bed, get between her legs and slip my rock hard cock into her freshly fucked pussy.  With the tip of my ready-to-explode cock at the entrance of her pussy, I locked my eyes on hers and slowly slid inside of her.  It was magic!  All I wanted to do was look into her eyes and at her beautiful face while I slowly entered and moved inside of her.  She whispered to me ...... "do you want to cum tonight?"  and I replied .... "Yes, more than anything in the world other than one".  When she asked what that one things was, I said "the only thing i want more than being able to cum inside of you at this very tender and beautiful moment, is for you to deny me the permission to do so".  She told then that's how it shall it be and that she hoped that didn't change my mind because the decision has been made.  I wasn't cumming that night.

Over the next 20 or so minutes, I very slowly and methodically moved my in and out and around inside of her, while simply enjoying where I was, what I was allowed to doing and the stunning beauty of this beautiful mistress Goddess before me.  I fell comfortably and deep into a sub space that was nothing short of bliss.  I could've stayed there forever, but eventually, Mistress had to pee. 

As an aside, as we lay together in the glorious afterglow, I mentioned to Mistress that I really, really hoped that she would finally end the agony of me having to receive the punishment I am still due for ejaculating without permission.  She immediately said (again) that it shouldn't at all be something that I should be looking forward to, and then left it at that.  My only response to that was what I felt was true in my heart .... "I understand Mistress and I look forward to enduring and receiving whatever punishment of correction that you deem necessary".  With that she smiled, sighed in delight and drifted off to sleep.  And there I was, orgasm denied, punishment still pending, returning from a trip deep into sub space, holding the most beautiful woman in the world as she drifts off to sleep. 

I'm a lucky man.